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December 16, 2019
Another Swenglish Mistake? Great Thunberg Tweets Out a Picture of Herself Looking Like an Impoverished Migrant on What She Calls an "Overcrowded Train;" German Train Company Replies, "Say, Did You Enjoy Your First-Class Ticket?"
She lies a lot. But we're supposed to ignore this because she's 16 and mentally handicapped.
See? She's attempting to depict herself as a destitute scrounger just barely getting by.
The reality? She had a first-class seat, but chose to sit on the floor for a photo-op. See the translation of the train company's tweet to Greta Thunberg, here.
Bonus: Schlichter tells Greta to go pound sand.
Clearly Greta Thunberg is being exploited by her cynical puppetmasters, but equally clearly she’s a tiresome, bizarre Marxist scold whose exploitation of the hapless dummies who buy into the climate change hoax is part of what is an increasingly violent plot to undermine capitalism and freedom. Recently, the cretins at TIME, which shockingly still exists in 2019, named her “Person of the Year.” That’s appropriate, since 2019 has been a very annoying year.
In 2029, after the world hasn’t ended but her usefulness has, she’ll be a Jeopardy question and probably shacked up with an unemployed performance artist named Björn in an Oslo suburb. Fun fact: “Greta Thunberg” is Swedish for “Cindy Sheenhan.”
But today, we’re all supposed to fall over ourselves over Pippi Longnagging – at least that’s what our betters command – yet it’s unclear why. Teenagers are notoriously ignorant, and ones spewing recycled Marxism are the worst of all. But the idea is not that this tiresome truant is some visionary thinker. The idea is to leverage her youth and awkwardness to keep you from speaking the indisputable truth that she’s a weird brat who presses for an ideology that butchered 100 million people in the last century. And now, she is hinting she wants to run up that score.
Trump mocked her and a zillion pearls were clutched. How dare you…criticize the Luddite pest who presumes to tell you how to live, leveraging the full benefit of her nearly 17 years of experience to explain to you how stuff should be. How dare you!
Oh, shut-up. Pound sand, you scowling urchin