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April 11, 2019

PUCK! ONT

LAST NIGHT THE QUEST FOR THE HARDEST TROPHY TO WIN IN SPORTS STARTED! Are you excited? I'm excited.

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Hockey

The East

So, who do you like for the cup? Last night three out of the five games were upsets, including the Ohio Cannon Cockers stunning the mighty Bolts who had jumped out to a three goal lead in the first. Can they do it three more times? Odds say no, but if Tampa is knocked out the East becomes wide open. Will the Leafs finally get the monkey off their back and slay the Bruins? Do the aging Pens have one more run in them? They looked like the Pens of old last night, forcing OT late, but the Isles slammed the door in the extra period, despite some unorthodox formations from the visitors .

Pens.jpg
Pens are running with a 1 man line and 5 goalies


Anyhow, who wins each of the following series?

Lightning/Blue Jackets
Bruins/Leafs
Capitals/Hurricanes
Islanders/Penguins


The West

For some reason, everybody seems to love the Sharks, and I'll admit they're a deep, talented bunch, but their goal tending is horrible, and they ended the season in a terrible skid. Still, they took care of Vegas last night pretty handily. It was upset city in the Central, with St. Louis and Dallas taking down higher seeded clubs, and what about the Avs? A mirror image of the Sharks, they squeaked into the playoffs on the strength of some incredible goal tending but only one good line. Still, the teams that worry me most are the Blues and the Stars, but once the smoke clears, I think it's obvious who will come out of the West:

Flaming c.gif

Predictions:

Flames/Avalanche
Sharks/Golden Knights
Jets/Blues
Predators/Stars


Finally, who comes out of the East? The West? And who hoists Lord Stanley's Cup when the dust settles?

And now here is some non-hockey content, although I can't imagine that anyone cares.

Customer Service

Service.jpg


If You Build It, They Will Come



The entire thread is hilarious, for those that feel like perusing it.


Just the Facts


135 Amazing Facts for People Who Like Amazing Facts


Guinness estimates that 93,000 liters of beer are lost in facial hair each year in the UK alone.


Count von Count's love of numbers isn't just a quirky character trait—in traditional vampire folklore, the bloodsuckers have arithmomania, a compulsion to count.

The first sales pitch for the Nerf ball was “Nerf: You can’t hurt babies or old people!”

132 more facts at the link.


Heebie Jeebies


Doctors find four bees in woman's eye, feeding on her tears


Bees (2).gif


Can't Wait For Socialized Medicine!


In The U.K., Blindness Is Free

Tell that to the lady with bees in her eyes

A Classy Gift For The Moron In Your Life

Vulgar Tea Cups & Housewares


Tea.jpg


Baseball

I know none of you probably noticed because of the hockey playoffs starting, but baseball season is also underway. Here's a story you may have missed (with video):

Umpire tosses dick who argues balls and strikes; tossed ball strikes umpire's dick and balls

Screw it, I'm going to go watch hockey. Tonight's ONT brought to you by poor timing:

Calgary text.jpg

The Yahoo Group says GFG!

digg this
posted by WeirdDave at 10:00 PM

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