Former Boyfriend of Dr. Vanessa Tyson: Due to Her Trauma Over Being Sexually Molested By Her Father, She Would Never Have Consented to Oral Sex
BILL KRISTOL DEFENDS WITH THE RACE CARD
| Main | Lifelong Republican and Trusted Adviser to Jesus Christ Almighty James Comey Has Some Wisdom He Must Share With You Now
February 08, 2019

Study: Journalists Drink Too Much, Are Bad At Managing Emotions, And Operate At a Lower Level Than the Average Person

This study is from 2017, but it's never been more true or more salient.

It is based on a small study, so I'd like to offer this caveat: it is undoubtedly 100% true.

Journalists' brains show a lower-than-average level of executive functioning, according to a new study, which means they have a below-average ability to regulate their emotions, suppress biases, solve complex problems, switch between tasks, and show creative and flexible thinking.

They score very highly on the Repeat What Other Journalists Are Saying on Twitter Scale, however. Among the most tractable, programmable people on earth, in fact.

orangemanracist.jpg

The study, led by Tara Swart, a neuroscientist and leadership coach, analysed 40 journalists from newspapers, magazines, broadcast, and online platforms over seven months. The participants took part in tests related to their lifestyle, health, and behaviour.

...

The results showed that journalists' brains were operating at a lower level than the average population, particularly because of dehydration and the tendency of journalists to self-medicate with alcohol, caffeine, and high-sugar foods.

Brian Stelter just emailed me to say, "Hi, my name is Tater, and I likes me some taters."

Forty-one percent of the subjects said they drank 18 or more units of alcohol a week, which is four units above the recommended weekly allowance. Less than 5% drank the recommended amount of water.

However, in interviews conducted in conjunction with the brain profile results, the participants indicated they felt their jobs had a lot of meaning and purpose...

You don't say? No shit, really?

Didn't they just spend $5.5 million on a Super Bowl ad praising themselves?

...

Journalists scored lower on:

Executive function. As well as the traits mentioned above, low scores for executive function also suggest poor sleep, nutrition, exercise, and mindfulness. Many participants reported they had no time for breaks while working.

You need high executive function to code, which is probably why they get so angry when you suggest that they learn to code.

Also, executive function is important in controlling one's emotions, which is why the explode like infants when you suggest they learn to code.

Silencing the mind, which is related to the ability to have thoughts without getting distracted by them, or a powerful ability to focus. Low scores indicate the opposite, suggesting journalists have a hard time preventing themselves from worrying about the future or regretting the past.

Um, and spending all day on Twitter and planning their next #SickBurn Tweet and their next Twitter Clapback.

...

The results, however, showed that the journalists were on average no more physically stressed than the average person. The blood tests showed that their levels of cortisol -- known as the stress hormone -- were mostly normal.

That's because, while they do deal withe pressure of short turn-arounds and quick deadlines, they have a powerful psychological advantage that helps them manage stress: they are innately very, very lazy and work as little as humanly possible which turns out to be even less work than the average human would guess is possible.

So that helps.

Related: I Have Seen the Media's Future, and It Involves Writing Checks With Lots of Zeroes to the Many Victims of Its Defamations and Witch-Hunts: Mark Hemingway at the Federalist.

I don't think they'll be able to plead Impaired Executive Function as a defense, though it would amuse me to see them try.


Thanks to this guy:



digg this
posted by Ace of Spades at 06:10 PM

| Access Comments




Recent Comments
Martini Farmer: "Hump Day! ..."

Linn Ridge: "Lots of content!! Morning, all y'all. ..."

Hans O'Lo: "Moronin', Hourde! ..."

Laughing in Texas: "JJ has arrived ..."

Laughing in Texas: "Good morning, horde! ..."

rhennigantx dont californicate my TEXAS: "WTFO? ..."

rhennigantx dont californicate my TEXAS: "675 I'd expect California to take over PGE and run ..."

Colin: "I'd expect California to take over PG&E and ru ..."

WitchDoktor, as if you give a damn: "Why would TGE insult clowns like that? ..."

Case my heroes have always been cowboys: ""....so turn it all off and shut it all down." ..."

sock_rat_eez,who actually liked ham&mf'ers[/i][/u][/s][/b]: ""Our record Economy would CRASH, just like in 1929 ..."

GWB: ""Californians should not pay the price for decades ..."

Recent Entries
Search


Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64