Washington Post: We've Spoken to the Charlestown Chiefs' Player-Coach Reggie Dunlop, and He Says There's a Secret Offer on the Table to Buy Out the Ailing Hockey Franchise

That's how I read this article about a supposed eleventh-hour White Knight for The Weekly Standard.

I'm hearing Minneapolis.

The Weekly Standard may live to fight another day.

The conservative political and cultural magazine's future appeared imperiled this week by its owner's consideration of a restructuring plan that might restructure it out of existence.

...

However, the Standard's founding editor, Bill Kristol, said Thursday that reports of the publication’s demise had elicited a "gratifying outpouring of support and, actually, offers to buy or help buy" the magazine. "So that's nice," he said.

Kristol declined to name interested parties.

Minneapolis. I hear a town in Florida is interested too.

He later amended his comment to say that there have been "expressions of interest from serious people-- not quite offers yet, but we'll see."

You know what another way to say "Not quite offers yet" is? "No offers."

Simpler. Punchier. More accurate.

In either case, any interest in the Standard would represent progress.

How so?

A lot of cancelled TV shows had "interest" by viewers in keeping it on, and yet... they're cancelled.

Editor Stephen F. Hayes reportedly shopped the publication around earlier this year but did not appear to find a willing buyer.

"Did not appear to find a willing buyer."

Wow, we're really putting a lot of fog and mist and gel lenses around very simple yes/no declarative sentences to obscure their blunt meaning, aren't we?

I think if you found a "willing buyer," it would appear that way, very clearly.

Under Hayes, it has maintained its traditional criticism of Democrats--

Keep that in mind. We'll get to that in a second.

...

The approach has not yielded big growth in digital traffic, however. According to the tracking firm ComScore, the Weekly Standard's website attracted just 822,000 unique visitors in April -- about half the monthly total it had when Trump was inaugurated in January 2017. It gradually made up that lost ground, and then saw a jump to 2.8 million and 2.6 million unique visitors, respectively, in September and October, the first month in which ComScore started including traffic flow to publishers from Snapchat.

Those are not good numbers. This site gets 3, 3.5 million uniques per month in normal months and I'm a fucking moron and the cobloggers aren't that much smarter. Slightly smarter, but not much.

By the way... Speaking of Twitter-Based Life Forms who never read the article but just the twitter headline:

The article says multiple times that there are no buyers "yet." WHich means "No buyers."

Why does Sonny Bunch malign Clarity by pretending there is a buyer -- several of them, maybe! --and Clarity is just being difficult about it?

Does the Twitter-Based Community even read articles when those articles concern their employers and employment situation?

This is especially annoying because a "VERY" well placed source in the Weekly Standard, per Brian Stelter, was pumping out the smear against Clarity that there was a possible buyer, but Clarity just wanted to shut down The Weekly Standard because of Corporate Greed and wanting to install the super-pro-Trump not-a-cuck-at-all Seth Mandel as the head of a new "Trumpalo lifestyle" magazine entitled True Trump Tales of Two-Fisted Action and Sexual Piracy.

Nonsense! Seth Mandel isn't even a cuck, he's the guy that hands orange wedges to other cucks' bulls at the halftime break.

Where is the buyer? If he existed, or did exist, why does no one mention this name? Why did the first stories out of the gate about this state that Hayes and Kristol had tried to find a buyer, but had been unsuccessful?

As I said yesterday, I'm sure Clarity would sell the Weekly Standard -- but what they don't want to do is endlessly pour money into this failing webzine to keep it operational while Kristol and Hayes spend eternity searching for eager buyers who almost certainly do not exist and never will.

Okay, so that bit about "maintained its traditional criticism of Democrats"--

Here is the Weekly Standard, going out strong, appealing to any on-the-fence left-wing buyers, by publishing a puff-piece about... Cory Booker.

Kristol's, Hayes', and Last's efforts to remake The Weekly Standard into Slate For Boomers bears final fruit.

Most of the post below the break:

Pink-slips for pinkos can't come fast enough.

Good luck getting a job in conservative media again, Warriors.

Oh by the way: You all kind of suck and leftwing media won't be wanting you either.

As Alexis de Toqueville said: "Suck my dirty dick, Cap'n Cornhole."

BTW: What cities did Reggie Dunlop claim were interested in buying the Chiefs? I can't remember them now. Let me know in the comments so I can correct this post with accurate Slap Shot references.

"Hmmm," Reggie Dunlop said, "maybe California..."

Inadvertent Admission: Bluebell points to this line from the Washington Post puff-piece, and notes it's a funny put-down -- though not intended that way.

" In either case, any interest in the Standard would represent progress. "

Indeed.

posted by Ace of Spades at 04:48 PM

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