CNN Special Snowflakes to Donald Trump: Please Stop Bullying Us After We Spend Hour After Hour of #FakeNews Attacks on You!

These people aren't being "bullied." They're nasty sissies who enjoy slapping and scratching but then cry if someone hits back.

So: Is CNN an innocent victim of "bullying," or is it an aggressive, seething sissy who likes to hit and bite and then cry when it gets its sissy ass kicked?

Well...

Today CNN contributor Sally Kohn declared that sexual harassment happens because "most men hate women."

Most. Hate.

CNN covered its #FakeNews claim that Donald Trump Jr. was given a Super Secret Decryption Key for hacked emails earlier than the public twenty-seven times as much as they spent on correcting their outrageously false claim.

A little more than an hour after the terrorist attack on the Port Authority (I earlier said "40 minutes," which was wrong), here was CNN, which is totally being bullied, itself totally not engaging in bullying:

A lot of fat people work for CNN (more fat men than fat women -- apparently they only want women with nice figures on TV), but I don't see Brooke Baldwin taking Chris Cilizza or Brian Stelter aside to tell them to lay off the carbs.

Oh, and this is cute: CNN made huge claims about Jeff Sessions' failure to disclose brief meetings with Russian officials in his ordinary course of duties as a Senator. But when it's reported that the FBI cleared him of any wrongdoing, stating that Sessions had no obligations at all to report such fleeing hey-nice-to-see-ya's, CNN "quietly backtracks" its previous reporting. I'd like to see a comparison of how much time they spent on the original news -- with the #FakeNews implication that Sessions did something wrong -- compared to how little coverage they've given the update/correction of previous implications.

CNN spends half of its time telling us that reporters are courageous heroes who rush into the fire -- and by the way, not only do 99% of them never rush into any kind of fire at all, but will cry if they're forced to leave their air-conditioned offices -- and the other half of the time whining that the Mean Man Said Mean Things About Them.

Choose one (1). You don't get to pose as heroes worthy of a Frank Frazetta tribute while crying that your tampons are itchy.

posted by Ace at 07:44 PM

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