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February 05, 2015
Brian Williams, 2013: I Have to Tell You, Alec Baldwin, That When My Bird Went Tango Uniform One Niner Fiver Kliks Outside of Najaf, I Pondered My Own Mortality With Manful QuietudeThis showboatin' sociopathic fabulist has been telling increasingly more Total Horeshit accounts of this Non-Brush with Not-Death since 2003, getting more Heroic and Steely-Eyed every time he tells the tale. April 2008: In another blog post, Williams again recalls the 2003 attack and says "we came under fire" -- explicitly linking his aircraft to the attack. He continues, "The Chinook helicopter flying in front of ours (from the 101st Airborne) took an RPG to the rear rotor, as all four of our low-flying Chinooks took fire. We were forced down and stayed down." But not on that list is a particularly Throbbing version of his Terror at Two Hundred Feet war story he told to Alec Baldwin, trying to impress him. He actually claimed he "briefly" -- and manfully, we assume -- contemplated his own mortality as his chopper was racked by SAMs and groundfire from the AK's. (#StolenValor fabulists like to mimic the lingo of actual soldiers to sound more badass. I'm sure if you asked this Walter Mitty motherfucker about the event he'd tell you how many "kliks" he was outside of Najaf.) But, see, what really happened was, when he found out a different helicopter flying a full hour ahead of his had been shot, Brian Williams was so traumatized that his life flashed before his eyes. "I guess I do say to myself and to others -- I've got this' -- and I don’t know where that unbridled confidence comes from," Williams told Baldwin, trying to describe where he gets his thirst for action and challenge. I wonder what further Appointments With Death he was about to recount for us before wistfully trailing off, like a Hero who doesn't want to talk about The Shit He's Seen. Gee I don't know where my ridiculous confidence -- my "I got this" response -- comes from when I'm in dangerous situations. I think it's mostly because I'm daydreaming these Perils and really am not in any sort of danger whatsoever.
Sean Davis notes that the same guy who defended Neil Tyson's lies and evasions is now performing the same services for Brian Williams. Eric Wemple notes (as many people have) that Princess Williams was certainly traveling with an NBC entourage, and those people knew the truth of this event, and yet NBC has published fabulist fictions about it not once but multiple times, with the official corporate position apparently being, "If it helps our soft, feminine-looking News Presenter appear more manly, let's go with it, for Corporate Branding Reasons." Incidentally, various Defenders of the Liberal Social Caste have claimed that it was inconceivable to them that Brian Williams would lie; ergo, it must just be a mistake. They claimed they could not fathom any possible motive for lying. Even though these shitbags work in a bullhshitty, connections-y, Who You Know industry, they claim to not understand the usefulness of a lie told for professional advancement and personal aggrandizement. Perhaps this will clear the mystery up for them. Twitchy's partial transcript of the David Letterman interview: Two of our four helicopters were hit by ground fire, including the one I was in.” "Four birds." See what I mean? Fuck you, Fabulist, Coward, Thief of Valor. But this is how Letterman, suitably impressed, comments on Williams' claims of heroism: “I have to treat you now with renewed respect,” summed up Letterman. Do the people claiming mystification at Williams' motive for lying now understand why people lie about Cool Shit They've Done? | Recent Comments
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Daily Tech News 19 April 2025
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