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« Tuesday Morning News Dump | Main | Another Viral Media Story Turns Out To Be, Get This, Completely Fabricated »
December 16, 2014

Welcome To 2016: Jeb Bush Officially Announces He's Running (Sort Of)

Oh yeah, Bush 2016 is real and it's going to be spectacular!

Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah!

Like many of you, our family was blessed with the opportunity to gather together over the recent Thanksgiving holiday.

Columba and I are so proud of the wonderful adults our children have become, and we loved spending time with our three precious grandchildren.

We shared good food and watched a whole lotof football.

We also talked about the future of our nation. As a result of these conversations and thoughtful consideration of the kind of strong leadership I think America needs, I have decided to actively explore the possibility of running for President of the United States.

In January, I also plan to establish a Leadership PAC that will help me facilitate conversations with citizens across America to discuss the most critical challenges facing our exceptional nation. The PAC’s purpose will be to support leaders, ideas and policies that will expand opportunity and prosperity for all Americans.

In the coming months, I hope to visit with many of you and have a conversation about restoring the promise of America.

Best wishes to you and your families for a happy holiday season. I’ll be in touch soon.

Finally! The party that has nominated George H.W. Bush, Bob Dole, George W. Bush, John McCain and Mitt Romney will have the White Knight moderate it needs to wrest control of the party away from those dirty conservatives.

Why is Jeb doing this so early?

I'm guessing because the Romney 2016 thing was getting real. All the talk from Team Mitt about how, "the field wasn't that great and he as much as he didn't want to run again gosh darn it, his duty to party and country might force him to" was probably getting donors all hot and bothered. Sometimes in politics momentum starts and self-fulfilling prophecies of inevitability are created. Jeb wanted to blunt that before it got going to strongly.

Well the Great White Moderate Whale has just thrown his hat in the ring. Now donors who want to unite behind someone are going to have to start picking sides. In just a few weeks there will be an address to which they can send checks. Attendance will be taken, so take the holidays to decide if you're on the Bush bandwagon or not.

It'll be interesting to see who else this forces into the same move. If you're in the establishment bracket of the GOP primary (hello Chris Christie and yes you Mitt Romney) Bush just fired the starter's pistol. Either you get in now or you risk being left behind.

While we enjoy this moment of pure glee at an amnesty loving, Common Core front runner for the GOP nomination, let us have a moment of silence of Rubio 2016. Bush's entry ends any hope Rubio had this cycle. They are personally close and share too much of the same donor base.

Excuse me while I go buy some popcorn futures. Demand is about to skyrocket.


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