Intermarkets' Privacy Policy
Support


Donate to Ace of Spades HQ!





Recent Entries
The Obama Revenue Service: Multiple Investigations Into IRS Workers' Open Cheerleading for Obama | Main | Email: Lois Lerner Was Interested in Job at Organizing for America
April 09, 2014

Julia Louis-Dreyfus Poses Nude on Cover of Rolling Stone, with "The Constitution" Written on Her Back

Ugh.

Well, first of all, if you want to see a partially naked woman, who shows you a discreet amount of topbutt, you can click on the Daily Caller.

I'm annoyed, generally, by the Nudity Gambit -- do these allegedly "artistic" types have no other bullets in their ammo belts as far as buzzworthy shots? -- and more annoyed that what is on her back is not the Constitution, but rather "The Constitution, As Imagined By Ignoramuses, Dummies, and Other Rolling Stone Editors."

At the bottom of her plastic temporary tattoo is the large signature of one John Hancock. You know, John Hancock, famous signatory of the Constitution... except he didn't sign the Constitution at all.

He signed the Declaration of Independence. Most people knew this, long ago. I guess they don't now.

What I'm guessing this is is the Declaration of Independence, but with "We the People" from the Constitution appended at its top... or, more likely (now that I look at the top of the tattoo) part of the Constitution with the end of the Declaration of Independence at its bottom.

Oh well, no one ever accused Rolling Stone or artistic types of sweating the details of the American legacy.

So here's what probably happened:

Someone at Rolling Stone was surprised, when making this tattoo, to not see John Hancock's name at the bottom of it, as he expected.

Then he realized "Oh crap, the Declaration of Independence is a completely different document!!!"

Then he realized, "Gee willickers, much of the American population (and most of the readership of Rolling Stone) is as historically illiterate as I am, and if they don't see 'John Hancock' at the bottom of our 'Constitution,' they'll think we made an error. So we'd better put that at the bottom of the tattoo, or else a bunch of dummies won't know this is the Constitution at all."

Thus, we have to introduce an error to get the dummies to come to the correct conclusion.

And...

What's most annoying is that they're probably right.

I don't know what this means but it's funny: There's a major #WarOnWomen going on in the comments, because a lot of neanderthals have chosen to sexualize Ms. Louis-Dreyfus merely because she chose to sexualize herself.

How dare they.

This has led to questions about where the Bill of Rights might be tattooed. The possibilities, as I understand them, are:

"Freedom Flaps" and "Coinslot". Nuff said.

Thanks to "Nip Sip." The actual references are by "Something" and "weft-cut loop," respectively.

Rolling Stone

The magazine for smart, educated, socially-aware young Americans who are over 60 years old and who are also as dumb as a box of chicken farts.


digg this
posted by Ace at 02:21 PM

| Access Comments




Recent Comments
Bigby's Chopstick-Fail : "I got lots of duck and soy sauce laying around ..."

Shep Smith: "Everyone here should just shut up about Ebola and ..."

McCoy, not a real doctor: "http://preview.tinyurl.com/klet9xt Another first- ..."

Fritz: "This post is lined with mucus. ..."

rickb223[/s][/b][/I]: "Concern over Ebola, not so much. Oh no, is that ..."

Eric Red Holder: "Posted by: J.J. Sefton at October 30, 2014 08:41 A ..."

Thin veneer of civility: "What are all the rest of you doing?Not being a bee ..."

Ricardo Kill: ""Quit your bitching. At least there is no math thi ..."

Sandra Fluke: "I'm always giving out for Halloween. ..."

Anthony from NYC: ">>> If I'm feeling generous I'll hand out Horsey ..."

MTF: "Wow, that Veronica Lake story is sad as all get ou ..."

traye: "Holy shit, this just made steam come out of my ear ..."

Recent Entries
Search


MuNuvians
Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
News/Chat
Archives
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64