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December 13, 2011
Grave New Worry of the Bien Pensant Left: If Tim Tebow Wins The Super Bowl, There Could Be a Christian Wildfire Resulting In Riots and MayhemLet me assure you this isn't a worry; this is a fact. If the Broncos, 8-5 and not really what you'd call a dominant football team, not only make the playoffs but defeat the Patriots and/or the Ravens and then go on to defeat Green Bay, 13-0 and likely one of the all-time best teams to ever play the game, that heralds the Rapture and then the End of Days tribulations. In any event, enjoy the ravings of a religious bigot straining mightily to explain, like a Klansman might, that his bigotry and hatred are rational, man. Next Sunday, the Broncos host the New England Patriots in a game coveted so much by the networks that NBC and CBS sparred in unprecedented fashion over who would get to broadcast it. And why not? While the Patriots are adored by their fans (myself included), to many nationwide they are regarded as the Sons of Darkness, with their perfectly coiffed Hollywood quarterback and their brilliant – one might say diabolical – hoodie-clad coach. I'm bolding that to note that while this guy is coming from the Jewish perspective, he is more crucially coming from a liberal perspective, and he's been taught, as many liberals have been, that Hatred is a powerful and useful weapon, and can be righteously wielded against the Unworthy. Us, I mean. Into the middle of it all rides Tebow. Absolutely confident that God is on his side, he comes across as a humbler version of the biblical Joseph, who, in this week’s Torah portion, audaciously lays claim to being the Chosen One, and then goes out and proves it. Tebow’s sanctimonious God-talk has led even pious peers like Kurt Warner to suggest that he cool it. Joseph could have used the same coaching. My daughter Che-Che just started crying. Little of this insanity, mind you, has to do with Tebow himself. I admire much of what he stands for. His mom’s decision to risk her own life rather than abort her fetus flies against my own – and Judaism’s – values, but neither am I pro-choice in all cases. His story is so improbable that if he were to win it all, a part of me would be wondering whether there is a Purpose behind it, just as I saw a divine hand in the equally unbelievable Red Sox victory of 2004. And it makes me wonder whether other Jews, the ones who don’t happen to have advanced degrees in religion and a few decades of rabbinic experience, might be even more seduced by this unfolding drama.... This guy is Jewish. I have to call out some Jews a bit on this point: There are some Jews -- quite good people -- who nevertheless feel free to indulge in a retrograde fear of the Christian religion which they would regard as horrific were it directed at their own. Certainly there is a history of pogroms in Europe, and, in America, discrimination. Such fears are not entirely unfounded. But the idea of a new age of pogrom based upon the Tim Tebow throwing a football seems to be a reactionary one, conceived in hatred, executed in bitterness. It just seems to be dressing up a tribalistic hatred in some socially-acceptable clothing. Oh it's not that I hate Christians and their false god or anything. It's just that I fear they are monsters who will go insane in religious ecstasy if a football hero wins a big game. Look, I really do believe in tolerance and acceptance and... well, amity, especially among Jews and Christians, who seem to be getting along pretty well. But tolerance is a two-way street. Those who desire tolerance of the practice of their own religion are hypocrites if they do not permit others to practice their own. And dreaming up fantastical Protocols of the Elders of Bethlehem murder scenarios doesn't sound very tolerant to me. It seems to suggest it is inherently evil to proclaim the Christian faith. I'm not even a Christian by belief (by birth, but not by belief), and I find the idea of that offensive: You're really instructing me that if I chose to become Christian, I would be required to hide that fact, lest I be accused of inciting a domestic disturbance? Or at the very least behaving in an incivil manner? Would any Jew accept the claim that the wearing of yarmulke in public is inherently incivil and offensive to non-Jews? Of course not. Any Christian "offended" to see a Jew unashamed to be counted as a Jew would be branded as a bigot -- and rightly so. What is the difference here? Oh, right. The riots. This idea is inculcated on the left, which on one hand preaches against Hate, where politically useful to do so, but on the other hand crafts Special Exceptions and Secret Caveats to explain why their own hatreds are not only permissible, but god-damned civic minded. Even righteous. At the end of the piece he claims he doesn't hate Christians; he just hates certainty. I would suggest it requires a certain level of certainty in the ill-will and violent temperament of Christians to spin this sort of piece. There's an old saying, easily adapted to this situation: Bigotry is like a fart. Only your own smell acceptable. Well, with all due respect: No, a fart is odious in all circumstances. No one's farts are super-special-sweet-smelling. People need to grow the hell up. Religion is inherently exclusionary. If you believe, you're part of that religion. If you don't, you're not. That's the point of it. There are no religions that I am aware of that make no distinctions between believer and nonbeliever. "But you're making me feel like an outsider" is not a strong enough reason to demand that millions of people either give up their faith or at least refrain from being so uncouth to proclaim it (as they believe their religion demands). We are all outsiders to some. No one is going to give up their beliefs to spare anyone of the pain of momentarily thinking "Well I don't agree with that or subscribe to that," and the whole project to mau-mau people into doing so should be abandoned as futile-- and obnoxious.
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