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May 27, 2011

Update: This is Old; This Is My New "Breaking News Classic" (TM) Feature
Mother of Raped Daughter Contributes Improvised Victim Impact Statement

That statement? "Die in a fire."

A man who'd raped her 13-year-old daughter was let out on...a three day pass.

She objected.

Antonio Cosme Velasco Soriano, 69, had been sent to jail for nine years in 1998, but was let out on a three-day pass and returned to his home town of Benejúzar, 30 miles south of Alicante, on the Costa Blanca.

While there, he passed his victim's mother in the street and allegedly taunted her about the attack. He is said to have called out "How's your daughter?", before heading into a crowded bar.

Shortly after, the woman walked into the bar, poured a bottle of petrol over Soriano and lit a match. She watched as the flames engulfed him, before walking out.

The woman fled to Alicante, where she was arrested the same evening. When she appeared in court the next day in the town of Orihuela, she was cheered and clapped by a crowd, who shouted "Bravo!" and "Well done!"

The punchline is: He died of systemic shock due to severe third-degree burns suffered by full-body immolation. Ba-dum-dum-tssss.

The woman is undergoing "psychiatric evaluation" and may be prosecuted for murder, or as I like to call it in this situation, "murder."

Her friends and family are asking for her to be released. I think this is an easy call. The state psychiatrist just has to say "temporary ten-minute insanity," and everyone agrees to believe that, and they let her go.

But we really know what's going on. What she did was actually justified, but the law can't admit that, so we'll just say one-time acute psychotic break and be done with it.

Damn It All: I did not check the date. This story is from 2005.

That is old, even for me.

Thanks to joncelli for that.

Related News: Hey, did anyone notice there's been a lot of shark attacks lately?

Might as well link that, since I'm linking seven year old news.

Resolution: Since this story is set around the Age of Sail, I can report the ending now.

The woman was pardoned and set free.

Since This Is A Wasted Post: I don't usually link current pop music, but I have to make an exception for the "Spice Girls," I think they're called, and this song "Wannabe."

I think it'll be a hit. But that's an easy call. I will go further: I think this Fab Five has something called "staying power," and will be remembered with the greats, like Elvis, Bob Dylan, and Cat Stevens, who, by the way, I also predict will not become some kind of weird Islamofascist recluse.

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