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May 11, 2011

Is This Something?

It's a well-done parody. As Jason F. says (who sends it), the connection they make is a little dicey.

But here's the Galactic Empire Times, with Darth Vader announcing that "We got him." Him, meaning bearded rebel in hiding Obi Wan Kenobi.

When the end came for Kenobi, he was found not in the remote uncharted areas of Wild Space and the Unknown Regions, where he has long been presumed to be sheltered, but in a massive compound about an hour’s drive west from the Tatooine capital of Bestine. He had been living under the alias "Ben" Kenobi for some time.

The compound, only about 50 miles from the base of operations for the Imperial Storm Squadron, is at the end of a narrow dirt road and is roughly eight times larger than other homes in the area, which were largely occupied by Tusken Raiders. When Imperial operatives converged on the planet on Saturday, following up on recent intelligence, two local moisture farmers “resisted the assault force” and were killed in the middle of an intense gun battle, a senior Stormtrooper said, but details were still sketchy early Monday morning.

A representative of the Imperial Starfleet said that military and intelligence officials first learned last summer that a “high-value target” was hiding somewhere on the desert world and began working on a plan for going in to get him. Beginning in March, Lord Vader worked closely with a series of several different Admirals serving onboard the Death Star to go over plans for the operation, and on Friday morning gave the final order for members of the 501st Legion (known commonly as "Vader's Fist") to strike.

Now Here's Something: Eddiebear sends this fake Craigslist ad, now deleted, probably because Keith Olbermann cried about it.

Here's the text of what it had said.


Work in Media: Executive Producer for Current TV (Chelsea)

Date: 2011-05-11, 2:00PM EDT
Reply to: job-ztnu5-2375147999@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

Executive Producer
Title: Executive Producer
Department: Editorial
Network: Current TV
Status: Regular/Full-Time


Brief Description of Duties

Looking for a patient, but assertive producer with the ability to manage Keith Olbermann. Primary responsibilities to include final edits of Keith’s Special Comment (emphasis on brevity for better video embeds); destroying mail critical of the host; overseeing daily press clipping with emphasis on Sarah Palin, Michelle Bachmann, Herman Cain and all other black or female conservatives; and operating Mr. Olbermann’s official social networking accounts (keep the #FOK hashtag alive!). Experience in being a male wing-man on frequent, unsuccessful Match.com dates a plus.


Qualifications

--Alleged familiarity with the complete works of Noam Chomsky
--Irrational and all-encompassing hatred of Bill O’Reilly, Sean Hannity, Glenn Beck and Rush Limbaugh
--Neutral carbon footprint
--Ability to accuse anyone of Nazism and war crimes
--Compulsive use of the word Sir in daily vocabulary
--Hold a New York chauffeur license for transport between KO’s mother’s house and studio
--At least two years’ experience watching Keith Olbermann on television


If qualified, please send a copy of your resume, cover letter and head shot to:

Attn: Human Resources
Current TV, LLC
1250 Broadway, 12th Floor
New York, NY 10001

Compensation: $45K-$50K
Principals only. Recruiters, please don't contact this job poster.
Please, no phone calls about this job!
Please do not contact job poster about other services, products or commercial interests.


PostingID: 2375147999

Thanks to Andy for that.

Is This Also Something? Dana Loesch and some woman named Frances Martel called the Larry O'Connell podcast (which I believe Gabe has appeared on in the past).

Martel kind of goes after Loesch, getting all mad that on Mother's Day Loesch had posted something positive about motherhood. Martel doesn't like anyone saying that her choices aren't ideal. She doesn't have children and doesn't like Loesch saying that having kids might be a good thing, and an ennobling thing.

Here's the point: Loesch says earlier that she's had a few cocktails. Martel decides to call her a drunk, at which point Loesch calls her a bitch.

Kind of fun.

digg this
posted by Ace at 05:39 PM

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