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November 14, 2010

Overnight Open Thread

Beef: It’s what’s for ONT

(What! Monty has a Sunday book thread. We can't class up the ONT joint a little?)

What a foolish question. Which brings us to...

Honorary Moron Does Good:

By winning a $129 million lottery ticket bought at a Detroit-area porn shop.

” (CNN) -- A group of friends got lucky when they bought a winning Powerball ticket at a Detroit-area porn shop. Mike Greer claimed the $128.6 million prize on Friday, on behalf of a group of southeastern Michigan residents that he dubbed "Team Victory Club." At a press conference in Lansing, Michigan, Greer wouldn't answer questions as to who purchased the ticket at Uptown Book Store in Highland Park, or why they were at the store in the first place. "Nobody cares," said Greer”

No kidding…there needs to be a reason? If only you people would apply yourselves more, as Mr. Greer has done, you just might make something of your useless, non-lottery-winning, porn-starved lives.

But enough tough-love and mockery...additional depravity as usual below the fold...

SatireWire Returns After an Eight-year Hiatus/Opium Binge:

It’s about damned time and the funneh-fu appears to be as strong as it was before. I can’t tell you how many times I linked his bit about Canadians having warships here at the HQ...maybe half a dozen? (“He” being one Andy Marlatt btw. He left his best stuff archived online even though the site was inactive)

Here’s the lead-in on one of his new posts regarding French strikers forming a protesters union:

"Paris (SatireWire.com) – Strikes that have rocked France for more than a month will abruptly end tomorrow as protesters announced they have all joined a protesters union and will immediately take the five-week vacation plus 20 sick days mandated in their contract.

Members of the new Union of French Protesters (PUF), authorized by the government this morning, demonstrated for five hours today and then went home, as stipulated in the PUF agreement that calls for a maximum 25-hour protest week."

Tons more funneh there. Along with Our Dear Furry Leader and Iowahawk, Marlatt is the third leg in the triad responsible for influencing everything I've ever written on this blog. And for that, you may send hate mail to each at their corresponding addresses. They love feedback I'm told.

Introducing the Pinto and how it Brought Down the WTC:

This was supposed to be on Friday’s ONT had my broadband not crapped out on me. But I noticed later in the thread that you freaks were actually discussing the sad little “frisky, carefree” thing. You’ll also note from the ad that it has a ‘wider stance’ (most guys can appreciate that) and that it’ll ‘put a little kick in your life’ (exploding gas tanks tend to do that).

Ah, but much like Alar scares, staged Dateline NBC accidents, and global warming/cooling/wetting/drying/shrinkage/spindling/folding/mutilating there’s more to the story than what you’ve been told. Take a look at the Schwartz Study portion of that link. It appears to be yet another case where public hysteria (fueled by sensationalist media and so-called ‘public interest groups’… I’m lookin’ at you Mr. Nader) who have an axe to grind get out in front of the actual facts.

Was the Pinto a rolling deathtrap? Probably no more than many cars of that era. Did it completely suck and illustrate how truly pathetic and apathetic U.S. auto-makers had become during the 1970’s? Yep, you’ll get no argument from me about that. The Pinto should’ve been smothered in the crib, but for different reasons than are commonly expressed. Mainly I just wanted an excuse to post this commercial:

And yes, the ad does say that it’s arriving September 11th. But not in what year! After reading the Ed Asner 9/11 conspiracy link Friday posted by Ace (if that really is his name) who’s to say that these flaming Pintos weren’t sent forward in time and launched into the WTC and Pentagon by Bush The Elder who was in charge of the CIA sometime around then? What doesn't the Hamburglar Society want us to know?

Volcano Evacuees Demand ‘Chamber of Love:

Well, who the hell isn’t? This is from Java, an island continent in the North Atlantic that Marco Polo discovered early in the Third Dynasty of Egyptianland and named after a popular carbonated beverage of that era.

Some of the 300,000 evacuees from the volcanic eruption in Central Java sheltering in football stadiums and public halls have made an unusual request. The evacuees say they have food and clothing but are prepared to queue up to fulfil an equally basic need, according to reports in Indonesian newspapers. The evacuees were ordered to leave a 20-kilometre danger zone around Mount Merapi, which has been spewing ash and heat clouds since late last month. Their demand is for what is being called a "chamber of love".

Any suggestions? An AoS Relief fund perhaps? Love Shack?

One of the Longest Continuous Martial Arts Fight Scenes Ever:

Or maybe THE longest. Who knows. Ace posted it a couple of years back, but it cannot be seen enough. And damn if I don’t have a hankerin’ for a spicy noodle bowl now. Scorpion-flavored.

Ostricheh and Giraffeh, Playing Tag:

DEATH TAG that is. (As requested by Peaches, who couldn't quite get enough of last night's koala steel-cage smackdown)

The main question we have here is: which grills up better?

I'm guessing the giraffe, while the ostrich belongs in the Mother Of All Deep Fryers.

And now, for the moment you've all been waiting for...

This weeks commenter stats:

Top 10 commenters:

1 [657 comments] 'Kratos (Ghost of Sparta)' [92.23 posts/day]
2 [489 comments] 'buzzion'
3 [436 comments] 'logprof'
4 [384 comments] 'CoolCzech'
5 [369 comments] 'Soothsayer'
6 [364 comments] 'The War Between the Undead States'
7 [300 comments] 'toby928▒'
8 [285 comments] 'curious'
9 [268 comments] 'Editor'
10 [263 comments] 'CDR M'

Top 10 sockpuppeteers:

1 [126 names] 'fluffy' [18.00 unique names/day]
2 [71 names] 'kbdabear'
3 [63 names] 'Chris in Va'
4 [47 names] 'andycanuck'
5 [36 names] '18-1'
6 [35 names] 'logprof'
7 [33 names] 'toby928▒'
8 [30 names] 'Mallamutt'
9 [28 names] 'Cicero'
10 [27 names] 'CoolCzech'

Notice: Posted by permission of AceCorp LLC. Please e-mail overnight open thread tips to xgenghisx@gmail.com. Otherwise send tips to Ace.

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