Will Folks: I Am Aggressively Working To Gather All The Evidence That Really Should Be In My Possession Already

Sorry, I can't keep away. Doesn't this strike you as odd?

Folks said the proof exists in e-mails and texts between him and Haley that he and his attorneys are pulling together now. “Nikki says it’s categorically false. The problem with that is it’s categorically true,” Folks said in a phone interview Tuesday. “I have a stack of emails and phone records in my possession, right now, that prove, right now, the affair happened.”

See that last sentence? I changed it. That's not what he said. That's what I would expect him to say. He has all the texts, right? And all the phone records. This is not a complicated procedure.

But here's the actual sentence he really did say:

"There will be a very aggressive effort mounted to obtain all of the data that will corroborate what I’ve said."

There will be (future tense; indicates intention, not existing fact) a very aggressive effort mounted ("effort" comes pre-packaged with the possibility of failure) to obtain (to-- future tense again; and obtain -- he doesn't have them now) all of the data (all of it? Wouldn't one untoward email be enough?) that will (future tense) corroborate what I've said.

See what I'm getting at? The way he's saying this, he's setting it up so it seems like there is a real chance of failure of proving this so if he fails, he can say, "Well, I tried, but I couldn't get the data together. But I'm telling the truth."

But I don't understand how someone who had any sort of relationship with someone would not have some incriminating records easily at hand. I mean -- can't you just dig up your old emails? Again -- one naughty one would suffice. One flirty one wouldn't prove an affair, but it would make the allegation more plausible.

Am I missing something? How is it so difficult for the very-capable, awesome Will Folks to get the sort of emails that he'd naturally have bunches of?

Why does he need a team to dig into his own awesome pipe-layin' past? Are there so many names in his little black book?

Why is this merely an "effort" and not an already-achieved fact? Why is he speaking of things that will happen, rather than those that already have?

It just seems that all of this has excuses for failure built into it.

Why the hell would he need excuses?

He's claiming this happened in 2005, not 1905. What the hell is with the archeological dig here?

Does he have the fucking emails as a previous statement said or is it that he "will" have them after an "aggressive effort" is made to collect "all of the data"?

This guy has said six things since I've heard of him, and five of them are either obvious lies or very suspicious, as they make no frickin' sense, but he's seriously asking people to trust him on that last one, the big one.

Which is pretty hard to believe, too.

The thing is, I kind of want to believe him. I have no big thing for Nikki Haley (just heard of her, really) and I'm cynical, so I tend to believe the worst, and further, psychologically, I feel less bad about being wrong when I suspect someone of something dirty than I do about being wrong when I defend them as innocent.

Know what I mean? If I said "Nikki Haley probably did this," and I was wrong, I'd feel bad about casting aspersions, but I wouldn't feel dumb and gullible.

But if I say "I don't believe this, she's innocent," and then she turns out guilty, I would feel dumb and gullible. Which is the worse thing for me. Feelin' stupid.

Psychologically, I have less at risk to just say, "Ah, she did it, come on. All rumors are true."

But... damnit, everything this guy says is either transparently false or suspiciously weird.

Right out of the box, he came at with me with some nonsense about revealing this in order to avoid "humiliation" to his honor and other twaddle; so his first introduction to me was a lie. "'Hello,' he lied," as the quote goes.

And then the strangeness just keeps on coming.

Uh-Oh... Here's some funny stuff that might have gotten lost at the end of the last post:Commenters have gone to Stage Three of a full internet craze -- Demotivator posters.

Demotivator: "Honor".

Slublog: Proof of Will Folks' DC Super-Playah Past.

Demotivator: "Principles."

From Empire of Jeff. This one playing on Folks' claim he had to reveal this to the press, but wanted to do so "respectfully" as concerns Nikki Haley. Demotivator: "Respectful Revelations."

(Don't send me these; it's too big a pain in the ass to upload and link them... just save them yourself to photobucket or flickr and post the url!)

posted by Ace at 03:31 AM

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