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February 19, 2010
NASCAR > Winter Olympics
I can't take it anymore.
I hate the Winter Olympics.
The one important moment they have spawned in the last 30 years (The Team USA's "Miracle on Ice" victory over the Commies) is just barely worth the 1000's of hours devoted to televising men in sequined unitards skating to contemporary versions of classical music.
I mean, c'mon. Sure the Ancient Greeks were pretty effeminate too, but I think even they would draw the line at giving out medals to an international assortment of men's ice dancers.
Which means, that in order to balance the unfortunate number of wimpy Winter Olympics posts this blog has seen in recent days, I have to put up a post about a real, red blooded, American sporting event: The Daytona 500.
Now, that is an event! And this year's 500 more so than ever.
Why?
5 words: Sarah Palin and Richard Petty.
(Additional Daytona images available at Palin's facebook page).
I mean, c'mon. That's what a sport should be about: fast cars, leather jacket & giant belt buckle wearing drivers, and the hottie babes who love them both.
You gonna tell me the Winter Olympics provides any of that?
"As if." (Spoken in the typical stoner inflection favored by those who believe that "snowboarding" and "snobocross" should be taken seriously, so that you Winter Olympics fans will understand the degree to which I mean this).
This year's race was pretty good too. Sure, they had a small problem with potholes in the track delaying things for a few hours (I wonder if repairing them is a "shovel-ready project" that is covered by stimulus funds?) but the ending was pretty exciting as Dale Earnhardt Jr. came from out of nowhere to nearly steal the victory from Jamie MacMurray.
And I don't even like Earnhardt. Tony "Smoke" Stewart for the win, baby!
In any event, I think even the original Olympians would agree with me on this. NASCAR is, after all, kinda sorta comparable to Chariot Racing.
Or in other words-
NASCAR:Chariot Racing:Ben Hur
Winter Olympics: Two Man Luge: Ben Dover
So have at it. Consider this your open thread for talking about the 500 or for dissing the Olympics or both.
And conservative voters...remember this when the 2012 primaries roll around:
You know who "saved the Winter Olympics"? Mitt Romney.
You know who that benefits? Sequin manufacturers.
Judge accordingly.
posted by Jack M. at
11:00 AM
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