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October 01, 2009

Contest: What Did the Messenger Probe Really See?

The Messenger Probe just finished its Mercury flyby and it has spectacular new photos of Mercury's odd "bright spot." There's just one problem:

A NASA spacecraft that completed its third and final flyby of the planet Mercury on Tuesday, snapping new pictures of the innermost planet, had a small data hiccup that has delayed release of the best close-ups, mission engineers said Wednesday.


Messenger also took snapshots during its close approach, but "we had a little bit of a hiccup in the data" that has delayed the release of those images, said Eric Finnegan, systems engineer for the mission at Johns Hopkins APL. "It's coming," he added.

Sure it is, just as soon as your photoshop boys are finished with it, right Finnegan?

Ladies, gentlemen, and multigender readers, put on your tinfoil caps and put me some knowledge. The moron who writes the bestest explanation for what the Messenger probe really saw -- and what NASA is covering up -- will get many front-page accolades, a year of free AOSHQ, and Lauraw will punch you in the junk!

I think the only rational explanation for the "hiccup" is that they found the President's birth certificate. (Yes, I took that low-hanging fruit to keep you lazy morons from it. Do better.)

Note for passing crazies: This is a contest. I despise conspiracy theorists. I don't believe NASA is covering anything up. And I am not saying this because of a permanent injunction not to bother those nice people over at NASA and JPL for their numerous cover-ups, conspiracies, and hidden secrets. I know that there isn't a man in a black suit attaching a bomb to the underside of my car right now and I never, ever check under the car each and every time I use it for such a bomb. Really.

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posted by Gabriel Malor at 05:22 PM

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