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June 21, 2009

Overnight Open Thread – Lawyers, Guns and Money (genghis)

(Well, we’ve got the lawyers part covered anyway)

In Astoria, OR, a Portland attorney recently tried out a novel excuse while defending himself against a speeding ticket: The car was speeding, not him.

”But Akin said he had no idea his BMW 535xi was going 76 mph in a 55 mph zone because of its handling characteristics. Akin buttressed his arguments with a PowerPoint presentation and testimony from a mechanic.”

Sheer genius! If only the judge had bought the argument. Can you imagine how many other situations that kind of logic would have gotten you out of throughout your life?

In other legal news, sometimes fate delivers us a near perfect metaphor. Or simile. Or something.

”JEFFERSONVILLE, Ind. -- A southern Indiana lawyer said he's embarrassed and has apologized for being found asleep headfirst in a neighbor's trash can after a night of drinking. Larry Wilder admits he made a mistake, but he was not charged with a crime, Louisville television station WLKY reported. Wilder said it all started Tuesday night when a client sent a limousine for him to come to Louisville's Jeff Ruby's Steakhouse. Wilder said he had about four drinks and his memory ends there, until a Jeffersonville police officer woke him up in his neighbor's garbage can. "I don't know that I was intoxicated that morning," he said. "All I know is I woke up and got in the house."

And haven’t we all been there before?

”Larry Wilder (aka “Gabriel Malor”), legal counsel for Ace of Spades HQ, shown resting comfortably.”

Added: Warren Zevon (R.I.P.) performs the title of this post. (The actual song kicks in at around 1:45, after a short portion of another song)

[Added by Maetenloch]

Since there was interest, I'll go ahead post the commenter stats.

Weekly AoS Commenter Standings

Well the king has fallen - long live Methos, the new king of sockpuppeteers!

Top 5 commenters:
1 [605 comments] 'kbdabear' [85.4 comments/day]
2 [325 comments] 'gator'
3 [318 comments] 'Methos'
4 [234 comments] 'momma'
5 [195 comments] 'toby928'

Top 5 sockpuppeteers:
1 [250 names] 'Methos' [35.3 unique names/day]
2 [122 names] 'kbdabear'
3 [57 names] 'Nom de Blog'
4 [44 names] 'toby928'
5 [38 names] 'Fungo'

Notice: Posted by permission of AceCorp LLC. Please e-mail overnight open thread tips to xgenghisx@gmail.com. Otherwise send tips to Ace.

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posted by xgenghisx at 10:35 PM

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