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June 15, 2009

Overnight Open Thread – Soon to be a Major Motion Picture (genghis)

Some links I found under the couch cushions while looking for money to pay the mortgage bill this month:

Item #1: Apparently today was a holiday, but you wouldn’t know it given that the banks were all open and millions of surly government workers still had to show up at their workplaces of discontent in order to take it out on the rest of us. But a holiday it was indeed: National Man Day, as reported by The Boston Herald.

”Nineteen-year-old Joel Longanecker of Celestine and his 26-year-old brother Aaron, of Indianapolis, have for months been rallying thousands to their masculine cause on Facebook. More than 260,000 people have pledged to "stand up and do manly things" on Man Day.”

“The Man Day organizers urge participants to take part in "manly" activities such as football, hunting or watching Rocky movies.”


That utterly lame list is the best they could come up with? Watching Rocky movies? The hunting part I can sorta’ agree with though…just depends on what you’re hunting. I suppose there’s room for yet another holiday in the pantheon of holidays, but so far “Man Day” just looks like a pale imitation of our most cherished national holiday: Steak and BJ Day, which this blog has been a staunch supporter of for years now. (And how sad is it that I actually had to go to Salon.com to get that link?) But if these two goofs want to proceed with the idea of Man Day, which in fact should really be every day, then maybe we can offer up some better suggestions on how to celebrate it.

More shenanigans below the fold.


Item #2: Ever had a song or jingle you can’t get out of your head, yet you hate so much that even jabbing an icepick repeatedly in your ears starts seeming like a perfectly rational decision? And what if, to add insult to injury, the source were a 60 second PSA from a state government agency which runs during every commercial break, every 10 minutes, on every radio station? And what if the sole purpose of the PSA was to get you to call in to an anti-litter hotline and narc on your fellow citizens? How much would you pay now?

Well, wonder no more. The many overnight denizens here from the state of Washington already know what I’m talking about. It’s a media campaign being run by The Washington State Department of Ecology. Just the fact that there’s a state agency called that should tell you something. So on behalf of the tormented souls who suffer this madness daily and who lay awake at night, screaming into their pillows “OH GOD PLEASE MAKE IT STOP!” I’m pleased to share this little ditty with you. WARNING: Once it has been heard, it can not be unheard. If Hell has Muzak, this is what it sounds like.

Item #3: Can’t let this post end on that horror, so once you’ve stanched the blood flowing from your ears and returned to your keyboard, here’s a heartwarming…well, strange actually, story from KTLA concerning cats and dogs and the ancient struggle between them.

”SAGE, Riverside County -- A woman got the surprise of her life when she walked into her garage to see why her dogs were barking. She found a full-grown mountain lion. Ana Lee Spray, 23, says her three toy chihuahuas were barking so loudly that it woke her up Saturday morning. She couldn't figure out what was wrong, and got up to check on the dogs. When she saw the animals standing guard at the opening of the garage, Spray investigated further. She ran into her daughter's bedroom, which has a window that looks into the garage, and quickly got the answer staring back at her. The chihuahuas, which weigh about three pounds each, had cornered the mountain lion. She says the big cat appeared to be angry and began hissing at her and foaming at the mouth.”

The U.N. is said to be assembling a negotiating team to be headed by former U.S. President Jimmy Carter in order to bring an end to this strife once and for all, according to anonymous sources. The same sources also informed the ONT that all options would be on the table, including a possible partitioning of the garage territory and a water bowl sharing arrangement.

Artist’s depiction of the garage incident showing the unprovoked , naked aggression by the chihuahuas against the unarmed cougar who was peacefully protesting the plight of his people. Staff photo by AP.

(You thought I was gonna’ use the Taco Bell dog, didn’t you…suckas!)

Notice: Posted by permission of AceCorp LLC. Please e-mail overnight open thread tips to xgenghisx@gmail.com. Otherwise send tips to Ace.


In memory of Blue, may he rest in peace

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posted by xgenghisx at 10:05 PM

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