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April 30, 2009

Cool Health Facts from Joe Biden

Allah's having fun with this idea.

Reminder from Joe Biden: You're never more vulnerable than when you're asleep. Stay awake until the swine flu threat is over.

Another tip from Joe Biden: Always leave yourself one bullet. If you feel an itching in your nose or throat, put the gun in your mouth and blow the virus out of the back of your head. Like they say, feed a cold, head-shot a fever.

A Joe Biden Home Remedy: If you feel a sore throat coming on, drink a gallon of Dran-o or other highly-caustic drain-cleaner. Don't worry if you feel a burning or tingling sensation -- that's how you know it's working, and all that rich, healthy sodium hydroxide is burning your virus away.

And a repost from the last thread. Joe Biden explaining how he calmly handled a likely swine flu outbreak:

So the other day, some friends of mine and I were sitting around Katie's Diner, having waffles and goofing around. Without warning, this guy at the table sneezed three times. We knew it was swine flu, and we didn't want to cause a panic so we calmly and rationally beat him to death with our chairs.

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posted by Ace at 03:18 PM

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