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January 01, 2009

The Best of 2008

From the Washington Times. Man of the Year? David Petraeus.

Newcomer of the Year? Ah, so obvious.

Newcomer - Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin. The Republican vice-presidential candidate galvanized the conservative base and injected much-needed energy into John McCain's election campaign. Her grand entry at the Republican convention in which she squared off boldly and defiantly against her critics signaled the emergence of a new generation of conservatives. “What's the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull? Lipstick, she said to a roaring crowd. And a star was born.

They name Obama for the "Political Performance of the Year." Yes... but.

It's rather easy to deliver a great political performance when the press endlessly covers for your and refuses to report your gaffes and disgusting terrorist political supporters. It's like playing a trivia game being told ahead of time what all the questions and answers are.

If we're going to give Obama political performance of the year, then I think we also have to acknowledge the Harlem Globetrotters.

Ever notice that Globetrotters sometimes hide balls under their shirts, throw buckets of confetti in their opponents' faces, and routinely use props like trampolines to illegally score baskets?

Yeah. The refs don't notice either. Why, the refs give the Globetrotters such a complete and utter pass that you'd almost think they were working for the Globetrotter organization.

So yes, Obama defeated all his foes with the on-the-payroll refs giving a big assist.

But then, the Harlem Globetrotters' record against their perennial opponents -- the Washington Senators, I think -- is sixty-three thousand two hundred ninety four and zero.

That's a pretty good record, too. So why no love for the 'Trotters?

Eh: Did you follow the pop charts in 2008? Me either. My idea of a fresh new track is Suzanne Vega's Luca.

But here are the biggest hits of 2008 mashed up into one semi-coherent song:

I have no idea what the fuck that is. But if the Corner is hip enough to post it, I guess I have to pretend to be, too.

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posted by Ace at 04:33 PM

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