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« Top Ten "Old Figures of Speech" Rejected before Settling on "Lipstick on a Pig" | Main | Ocho Cinco May Have to Spend Cuatro Milliones To Wear New Name On Jersey »
September 10, 2008

Joe Biden, Starring in Terrror at Two Thousand Feet

Here's how Joe Biden describes the encounter he calls Cloud-Pirates of Khandahar: Sky-Warriors of the Golden Triangle.

"What I care about is: What in God's name is she going to do — along with John McCain — about the thousands of people who don't have health care?" Biden asked. He'll ask her about "The superhighway of terror between Pakistan and Afghanistan where my helicopter was forced down...John McCain wants to know where Bin Ladin and the gates of Hell are? I can tell him where. That's where Al Quaida is. That's where Bin Ladin is. It's not in the country of Iraq."

Here's how people not named "Joe Biden" reported Death-Duel at the Gates of Hell (aka Operation: HAMMERCOCK):

Update at 3:33 p.m. ET: CNN says a Kerry spokesman has told the network that the helicopter landed because of impending bad weather, that none of the three are hurt -- and that all three now are out of Afghanistan.

Update at 3:43 p.m. ET: A Biden spokesperson also is characterizing the landing to CNN as more of an "unscheduled," instead of "emergency," event because of unexpected bad weather.

Wow, Joe.

You've really been in the shit, haven't you?

You've seen fire, and you've seen rain.

Mostly rain.

Joe Biden for Vice President

He has the experience and judgment to safely operate an umbrella.

Gee, I wonder if Sarah Palin has ever been forced down in a small aircraft.

Due to bad weather.

In Alaska.

The Names of the Other Senators... on that scary paramilitary chopper have been forwarded to me by Rev. Doctor E. Buzz Miller:

Senator Brick Hardchest, super agent, Lead Delta Vector Force Insertion.

Senator Chest Crackington, insertion agent of Surgical Insertion Team, Force Vector IV

Senator Chuck "Too Tall" Rocklingsteel, Lt. Col, Jetforce Spectrum Team, Insertion Vector Code Name Avalanche

Senator Fleet Tazzoni, chairman, RAND Institute for Foreign Intervention

Senator Thad Flatiron, Special Envoy , Tidewater Consulting, Counter-Terrorism Unit Force Delta.

Senator Fullington "Blazer" Norwich, Lt. Col, Attack Squad Delta Vector

More About the "KillForce 13," the Secret Senatorial Strike Force: eman describes their background and mission--

Out of 114 Senators a few were chosen by the Gods of War to crush the enemies of Freedom.

That's what I heard too. They're like the Joe Force, except instead of being armed with nunchucks and laser-carbines, they can send mail for free.

Which is pretty fucking cool when you think about it.


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posted by Ace at 06:39 PM

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