More Judicial Activism: Duke Football Sucks, eh!* [krakatoa]

I was going to do a piece on North Korea blowing up one of its Nuclear Reactors and how that's a feather in the cap for Bush's foreign policy, but that whole story is being covered by some other news service that wants to be paid for their inimitable reportage.

Reuters happens to have a video of it though.

So instead, I'll talk about how bad Duke Football is.

Duke Football is so bad, Crystal Mangum couldn't be bothered to accuse the team of rape.

Duke Football is so bad, Mike Nifong is trying to walk-on to the team in order to lower his public profile.

Duke Football is so bad, the Judicial System told Louisville that they couldn't in good conscience claim that Louisville is suffering any hardship whatsoever from Duke's reneging on the remaining three games they scheduled.

In a lawsuit filed late last year, Louisville asked for $450,000 in damages and any additional damages the court saw fit.

But Duke's lawyers argued that the Blue Devils' performance on the field was so poor that any Division I team would suffice as a replacement. Duke is 6-45 over the past five years, 13-90 since 1999.

Judge Phillip J. Shepherd of the Franklin County (Ky.) Circuit Court agreed, according to the Louisville Courier-Journal.

"At oral argument, Duke [with a candor perhaps more attributable to good legal strategy than to institutional modesty] persuasively asserted that this is a threshold that could not be any lower," Shepherd wrote in a summary judgment issued Thursday, according to the paper. "Duke's argument on this point cannot be reasonably disputed by Louisville."

* Yeah. I'm stuck in Montreal for the next 6 months. So I'm learning to speak Canuckistanian. Or whatever the hell they call it up here.

posted by xgenghisx at 06:56 PM

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