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March 13, 2008

Heh: Bitchy Media Alte Kachers Go At It On Air
Added: Hulk Smash!

Stay with it. The pyrotechnics are at the end.

But let it build like one of those toe-curling orgasms the delightful Ms. Beckinsdale was just so affably describing to us.

It's like Anchorman with old dudes. The guy with the glasses was one second away from being called a Smelly Pirate Hooker.

More Video Funny: Allah has quotes from the two years on the toilet story; and if you're still into it, Keith Olbermann is in full-on Hulk transformation mode over racism in the Democratic Party.

I dunno. I always click on those wanting to savor the stupidity, but my mind (and browser) drifts after three seconds. So I have no idea if this is good. I just can't watch it. He's like unwatchably awful Showgirls bad, not delightfully awful First Knight bad.

Oh, and speaking of the Hulk: Edward Norton was somehow given script approval for the next Hulk movie and is threatening to not promote the film unless his ideas are present in the script.

Edward Norton? A prissy, bitchy diva who's hard to work with and overconcerned with his integrity as an actor and as a human being and as a human being actor?

Wow, could not have seen that one coming.

Smart move giving him power of the script. Smart. I'm sure this Hulk sequel will do so much better than the first film now that it has a name actor attached. That's so crucial for popcorn genre flicks. Especially those where the main character is played by a videogame 'toon for two thirds of the movie.

And, you know, of the fifteen hardcore Hulk fans that exist on the earth, four of them are also hardcore Edward Norton fans.

So: Box office gold.

The New Hulk Trailer: Okay, what-ev-er. It looks... kinda good.

It helps that the Abomination seems to be the villain -- who's the only Hulk villain I know, apart from some big-brained mastermind type idiot whose name I don't even know. He should have been the villain in the first one, rather than that "Absorbin' Man" stupidity.

Anyway, looks not awful. Got Tim Roth and the dick from Dawn of the Dead in it. Liv Tyler too, but who cares, and she's no Jennifer Connelly.

I find the goofy self-help subplot -- psychiatrists, Zen meditation -- a bit non-superhero-ish, but I guess if you had a two and a half ton nine-foot green maelstrom of rage inside you, you might actually pick up a John Bradshaw book too.

But only in that situation, and in no others, would that be excusable.

Thanks to Z Ryan.

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posted by Ace at 01:15 PM

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