Hawaii, the forgotten primary.

Today, the great state of Hawaii goes to the polls. On the Democratic side, there are 20 delegates at stake in that race. For comparison purposes, great all-important New Hampshire only offers 22.

And yet, no one is mentioning Hawaii. It's all "Wisconsin this" and "Texas and Ohio that". I, for one, refuse to allow this slight to continue. I mean, really. Where would you rather be? Madison freakin Wisconsin surrounded by fat, pasty, cheese-gargling moonbats, or Honolulu, Hawaii surrounded by sexy hula dancers? That's what I thought.

Sure, Hawaii is Barack Obama's home state. And he should win convincingly. But does that mean we should ignore this primary? Of course not. You know who wants you to forget about it though? Hillary Clinton. You don't want to be played by Hillary Clinton do you?

Of course you don't. So let's give a shout out to our countrymen on the Islands. After all, they gave us Don Ho, Jack Lord, a bitching TV theme song, and the coolest ferrari driving Private Investigator of all time.

So here's to you, Hawaii! May Pele keep the lava at bay (except in Clinton strongholds). This is one haole who would never forget you.

posted by Jack M. at 01:40 PM

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