A "Must-See Documentary" About... LARPing! | Main | Fleeing Robbery Suspect Victim of Society And Hungry Alligator, But Mostly Hungry Alligator
November 13, 2007

Saudi Prince To Buy "Flying Palace" Supersized Jet With Jacuzzis, Movie Theater

Allah commanded him to load the supersized A-380 Aurbus with hookers and foosball:

Once done, the Airbus A380, the world's biggest passenger plane, will be a "flying palace" for Prince Alwaleed bin Talal, the manufacturer announced Monday.

Airbus SAS would not give a specific price tag for the VIP double- decker jet, with its football field-length wings, saying only that it would cost more than the aircraft's list price of $320 million.

That doesn't even include the money the prince will spend to custom fit the nearly 6,000-square foot plane to include whatever he wants. The options include private bedrooms, a movie theater or even a gym with a jacuzzi. He'll also need a flight crew of about 15 to operate the luxury liner.

...


The prince, who is in his early 50s, appears to have a taste for super-sized jumbo jets. He already is the only private owner of a Boeing 747-400, Airbus said.

"It's like buying a new car or a new TV," Velupillai told The Associated Press. "One wants something bigger and better."

In related news, Palestinians are starving, and it's because the Jews won't feed them.

UPDATE/RETRACTION: This story read like a punking from the get-go. Well, it was a punking.

"The elephants get drunk all the time. It is becoming really dangerous. We need to stop making alcohol available to them," the 26- year-old socialite said in a report posted on World Entertainment News Network's Web site. Her comments were picked up by other Web sites and newspapers around the globe.

Last month, six wild elephants that broke into a farm in the state of Meghalaya were electrocuted after drinking the potent brew and then uprooting an electricity pole.

...

Hilton promised to improve her bad-girl image after she completed a jail term in June for violating probation in an alcohol-related reckless driving case.

She announced plans to do charity work in Rwanda, but the trip was postponed until next year.

I know it takes three miracles to grant sainthood, but we can count the Miracle off the Invisible Panties as one, right? And also getting away with dropping the word "Nigger" on videotape has got to be Miracle Two.

This article reads like a joke, but I'm seeing it on Breitbart's feed. Read the following two sentences and tell me I'm not being punked:

"As part of her global elephant campaign, Hilton should, in fact, think of visiting this region literally infested with elephants," Goswami said.

"Infested with elephants?" I'm imagining an exterminator coming to my house, knocking on some joists, taking some measurements, and noticing a seventy-five pound slab of elephant feces in a corner and then telling me, "Buddy... I think you've got elephants."

Okay, how about this one:

Another conservationist said elephant alcohol abuse was just a symptom of the real problem.

And that real problem, of course, is Clinical Elephant Depression.

Not to make a problem sound easily solved, but... can these people just, like, lock up their liquor so that elephants don't drink it? Am I the first to suggest this?

I realize it's never worked with Ted Kennedy, but then, like otters and baboons, he has a primitive tool-using capability.

digg this
posted by Ace at 05:08 PM

| Access Comments




Recent Comments
[/b][/i][/s]Muldoon: "The Granite Museum may actually be a good bargain ..."

Vic We Have No Party: "192 CBD is probably just now realizing, mid-crost ..."

no good deed: "Aw, Fen, I'm so sorry to hear that. Praying for th ..."

Colin: " He leaves a wife and 17 year and 20 year old daug ..."

Bitter Clinger and All That (Back from the Dead): "Posted by: NALNAMSAM at October 22, 2017 06:47 AM ..."

no good deed: "I am digging the weather we are having right now. ..."

freaked: "For those so inclinned the Weinman Mineral Museum ..."

All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes: "Such sad news, Fen! Of course. ..."

FenelonSpoke: "For those that were on the gun thread last night I ..."

All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes: "CBD is probably just now realizing, mid-crostini a ..."

Bitter Clinger and All That (Back from the Dead): "Posted by: 9 Dead guys that went looking for him a ..."

Mike Hammer, etc., etc.: " Well, that's good. Because you should never just ..."

Recent Entries
Search


MuNuvians
Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
News/Chat
Archives
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64