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October 17, 2007

The Rhodesbag Fire

How the AmSpec managed to avoid the words "masturbatory fantasy" is beyond me. Clearly Sean Macomber is a better man than I.

After recounting some of the more, um, florid fantasias about the Randi Rhodes Non-Mugging from some of the, uhhh, fervid subscribers to the Community-Based Reality, Macomber notes, as I easily predicted, they refused to accept an alternate version of reality from Rhodes' own lawyer.

Despite the contentions of Rhodes' own lawyer and Air America Radio -- not likely members in good standing of the Vast Right-Wing Conspiracy -- Rhodes' fans refused to let the hate crime narrative give up the ghost. "We are likely to be more accurate on this board than the entire domestic news industry," one aficionado declared at Rhodes' official site. Another seconded that dismissal: "Unfortunately the AAR statement was so vague it only worsened the situation."

Vague? The reports of a presumed hate crime are unfounded seems to be the sentence-length antonym of vague. And even leaving aside whether a person whose profile lists his location as "The 13th Floor of the Tower of Terror" and auto-signs every post with the refrain, "Republicans will never be happy until they have completely destroyed the earth and ended all life as we know it" is going to be more accurate than the entire domestic news industry, is he going to be more accurate than Rhodes' lawyer and uber-liberal employer?

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say...probably not. There is, however, something bigger going on here, encapsulated in the determination of Rhodes' fans, against all facts to the contrary, to hold-tight to the pipe dream of right-wing fanatics hiring Blackwater agents to beat her as she walked her dog: They so wish it were true. As with global warming alarmism, these sorts of messianic martyr fantasies about neo-Nazi conspirators aligned against liberals' salvation program for the masses are delusions designed to assure people clearly desperate for meaning in their lives that they are historically significant figures living in historically significant times. History, sadly, is not made within the virtual walls of online echo chambers.

I half-watched Secretary again last night. A lot of people seem to get off on fantasies of psychosexual domination, I guess. Intruding on their fantasias with facts is like knocking on the door when they've been in the bathroom for an hour.

I have a simple cure for these people, though I doubt they'll have the stomach for it.

1) Stand in front of a mirror, looking directly at yourself.

2) Realistically recount your meager achievements and influence.

3) Speak the following words forcefully to yourself: I'm just not worth the bother of political repression, and I never will be. I'm an ineffectual douche with delusions of importance and deep-seeded psychosexual fantasies about domination by a strong man. I really have to grow up and get over myself and move out of my mom's basement.

Repeat this mantra every day and one day you might be within a stone's throw of normal.

Heh:

rhodesshirt002.jpg

What about one about the Vast Bloody Mary Conspiracy?

From Michelle, who runs down more crazy-talk from the usual suspects.


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posted by Ace at 01:56 PM

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