In Case You Weren't Sure, Wesley Clark Is Running

Or so say Jim Geraghty's sources. From a previous profile of Clark:

Interviews with a wide variety of current and retired military officials reveal that Clark was disliked by only three groups: Those whom ranked above him in the chain of command whom he ignored, his peers at the same rank whom he lied to, and those serving beneath him whom he micromanaged. Other than that, everyone liked him.

If Geraghty gets to pull out his old profiles of Wesley Clarke, then I get to dust off my old "TimeRanger" jokes.

Basically, the key to Wesley Clark is this: On the campaign trail in New Hampshire, he decides to boast of his strong belief in time-travel. It's not as if there are pressing, real-world issues to talk about. Just a global war on terror, an economy producing an anemic rate of job-growth, and perhaps the most ideologically-important election in, oh, fifty years or so. But General Wesley Clark has his eyes on the really big issues -- you know, like the various plot inconsistencies in Quantum Leap.

Geeky as I am, even I look down on this guy, [who's] on the campaign trail debating the feasibility of the solar-slingshot time-displacement maneuver in Star Trek.

I can't wait to see this guy's detailed four-point plan for improving job-growth:

1) Federally-funded job retraining programs

2) "Fair trade" rules imposing penalties on countries with substandard worker and environmental protections

3) Increasing the tax credits for the working poor

4) Flux capacitors

No, seriously, he did talk up time travel as an important area of research that was quite attainable.

posted by Ace at 06:19 PM

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