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November 30, 2006

First-Time Novelist Wins Prize For Worst-Written Sex Scene Of Year

"Bulging trousers:"

The first-time author won for descriptions like this one, contained in Twentysomething: "everything is pure white as we're lost in a commotion of grunts and squeaks, flashing unconnected images and explosions of a million little particles."

He's obviously never had sex. He completely misses the awkwardness, embarrassment, nauseau, chagrin, etc., so central to the sexual act.

Hollingshead, the underdog, clinched the title with his description "bulging trousers," judges told the Associated Press.

"Now in its 14th year, the Bad Sex award was won last year by Giles Coren for an unpunctuated 138-word description of coitus, followed by the two-word sentence, 'Like Zorro,'" according to the Guardian.

Like Zorro? That's freakin' good. How do they call that bad sex writing?


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posted by Ace at 07:09 PM

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