Britney Spears Enters Firecrotch Derby

A safe for work report on the public pooteration, from ABCNews, which cynically suggests it's a publicity ploy.

Spears is the latest star to give people a glimpse of what's usually covered up, a trend that asks the question: What value, if any, does culture place on modesty today?

On Nov. 22, cameras caught Spears, the recently separated pop star and mother of two, in a leopard-print minidress so short it revealed her underwear.

Two days later, Spears was photographed getting out of a car in a hiked-up miniskirt. This time, her underwear was nowhere to be found.

According to celebrity blogger Perez Hilton, Spears' up-skirt shots are no mistake — they're a classic cry for attention.

"She wants the picture taken. She wants the publicity. She wants people talking about her," Hilton said of Spears. "That's what people love to see more than anything. Why do you think celebrity sex tapes sell so well?"

The photos, which spread virally across the Internet, gained Spears entry to a club ruled by repeat flashers Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan. Cameras have caught Lohan panty-less four times over the last two months.

"You'd think she'd either wear pants or panties, or be more careful about how she exits a car," blogger Hilton said. "Four times. That's no accident. That's deliberate."

Nonsense. Sometimes, when you're doing six-dimensional matrix multiplication in your head, you just forget to wear your underwear.

Below are the links, which are, of course, not safe for work.

Seriously, not safe for work.

All I know is that Paris Hilton is right there in upskirt beaver shot. She just seems to bring distasteful public displays of sexuality with her wherever she goes.

Okay, once again: Not safe for work.

And more (not safe for work).

I'm only posting this horrid filth to cushion the blow over the claim, from PerezHilton, that there is no Jessica Simpson sex tape. No link; that's all he says. He doesn't link to anything and he doesn't say how he knows this.

Thanks to the Portly Pirate.

posted by Ace at 04:43 PM

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