Ned Lamont, Loser: Michael Steele, Winner | Main | CNN Spins For Republican Hopes Of Holding House
November 03, 2006

Biggest Story Of The Century: Some Guy You Never Heard Of Is A Homo

At least according to the left, it's a very, very big story.

Because this guy you never heard of is also an Evangelist you never heard of, and making anti-gay statements you never heard of, while having gay sex with dudes you definitely never heard of.

But it turns out he's a homo, so suddenly he's someone you're going to be hearing a lot about, and, in fact, will become within 24 hours The Most Important Figure On The Religious Right In All Of The History Of The Universe.

And you'll hear less about the fact that, for a fire-breathing right-winger, he was kind of a liberal pussy.

But no matter. I just found out another one of my heroes who I had never heard of before had on occasion lunched at the Sizzler's Man-Steak Buffet.

His name is seared, seared into my memory, or will be, once I find out what it is.

I haven't been this dejected since I found out George Michaels was gay and Nick Rhodes was straight.

Reports say that some of his parishoners began to become suspicious of his sexuality when they realized he looked like this:

haggard.jpg

(Okay, cheap joke, probably borderline homophobic, and on top of that, even Instapundit's made it already. But, come on. I'm not saying that some people "look gay." I would never say such a thing. No one "looks gay."

On the other hand, some people do "look Supra-Gay.")

Apparently he was outed by a gay prostitute whom he'd been paying for messages, with incidental gay sex and drugs included gratis.

I feel bad for this guy. I mean, an Evangelist preacher buying drugs and paying for sex from a gay hooker.

Sometimes disaster just seems to strike out of nowhere, doesn't it?

I wonder how people hold on to their faith when such unforeseeable tragedies befall them.


By the way... The Gay Hooker came forward with his allegations when he realized an Evangelist was against 1) ordaining gay preachers and 2) gay marriage.

You can imagine how important those issues are -- beconing a preacher, getting married -- to a Gay Hooker.


digg this
posted by Ace at 07:35 PM

| Access Comments




Recent Comments
Duke Lowell : "Hmmmmmmm. Weird. ..."

Slapweasel, (Cold1), ([b]T[/b]) Baseball Nut [/i] [/b] [/u] [/s]: "*Boom-Shakka-Lakka!* ..."

Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM: "Coolest physics demo I saw was a standing wave, di ..."

buzzion: "[i]386 Oh dear, am I gonna go all militant German ..."

tu3031: "Went to school near there in the 80's - very Irish ..."

2009Refugee: "Oh dear, am I gonna go all militant German Left Wi ..."

buzzion: "[i]381 Baader-Meinhof. Posted by: flounder, rebel ..."

flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner: "Coolest physics demo I saw was a standing wave, di ..."

riktheYFITB: "Know how there's one (1) Howard Johnson's restaura ..."

Bob @ NSA: "[i]I had never heard of that bowling ball demo, th ..."

flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner: "Baader-Meinhof. ..."

Professor Chaos aka gumdrop gorilla: "This Damon Affleck thing is also not good for Jimm ..."

Recent Entries
Search


MuNuvians
Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
News/Chat
Archives
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64