16-3 = Bite Me, bitches! [Johnny M. Coldcuts]

Listen up, mofo's. I made so much cash on my college football picks that I not only made bail money, I had enough left over to make my little "problem" with the Thai tranny "disappear".

So, I'm a free man once again. And I'm going to Vegas. By way of Tuscaloosa, I think. Because I noticed Beth from My Vast Right Wing Conspiracy dropped by in the comments, and she seems like a woman of distinction and exceptional tastes. By which I mean easy. That's just the way I roll. Like the Tide, baby.

Anyway, I figured I'd throw up a quick recap of yesterday's action so you 'tards could kick yourself for not following my advice.

Winning Picks: Ohio State, Texas, Auburn, West Virginia, Southern Cal, Florida, LSU, UAB, Georgia, Iowa, Virginia Tech, Clemson, Penn State, Nebraska, Oregon, Texas Tech.

Losing Picks: Notre Dame, California, Michigan.

See that? That's 16-3 against the spread with 3 games remaining to be played.

Never, I repeat never, doubt the memories of a time-travelling, foul mouthed, talking sandwich bitches!

Now I'm off to blow my winnings. Beth, make sure you get us a couple seats at Dreamland, OK?

Note: The original image of me, Johnny Coldcuts, was created by a punk-ass bitch named Skippy who writes (if you can call it that) at "Enjoy Every Sandwich". He cries when he doesn't get attention. But what do we care? He's Canadian, and they don't matter anyway.

UPDATE: 17-3 bitches! Thanks for covering TCU. Just like I predicted...

UPDATE #2: 17-4. I BLAME BUSH! Son of a bitch had 3 rushing TD's before he broke his leg. Just for that, Kentucky's #1 fan Ashley Judd gets no sex from me tonight. I don't placate.

posted by Ace at 03:01 PM

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