Intermarkets' Privacy Policy Support
Donate to Ace of Spades HQ! Contact
Ace:aceofspadeshq at gee mail.com Buck: buck.throckmorton at protonmail.com CBD: cbd at cutjibnewsletter.com joe mannix: mannix2024 at proton.me MisHum: petmorons at gee mail.com J.J. Sefton: sefton at cutjibnewsletter.com Recent Entries
The Classical Saturday Coffee Break & Prayer Revival
Daily Tech News 21 December 2024 Just The ONT, Ma'am Giant Animals Cafe Quick Hits Democrat Strategist Ruy Texiera: The Public Gave the Democrats a Clear Message About Their Rejection of Identity Marxism, But the Democrats Don't Want to Listen Kamala Harris To Be Offered $20 Million in a Media Payoff Disguised as an "Advance" on Book Royalties Plus: Media Makes Excuses for Covering Up Biden's Obvious Senility AGAIN: A Car Plows Through a German Christmas Market at a Very High Speed, Sending People Flying Like Bowling Pins, Killing an Unknown Number David Samuels: Barack Obama Created and Maintains an Echo Chamber Messaging System That Deranges and Perverts People's Thinking Every Day LOL: MSNBC Reportedly Demands That Joy Reid, Stephanie Ruhle Take Pay Cuts to Keep Their Jobs Absent Friends
Bandersnatch 2024
GnuBreed 2024 Captain Hate 2023 moon_over_vermont 2023 westminsterdogshow 2023 Ann Wilson(Empire1) 2022 Dave In Texas 2022 Jesse in D.C. 2022 OregonMuse 2022 redc1c4 2021 Tami 2021 Chavez the Hugo 2020 Ibguy 2020 Rickl 2019 Joffen 2014 AoSHQ Writers Group
A site for members of the Horde to post their stories seeking beta readers, editing help, brainstorming, and story ideas. Also to share links to potential publishing outlets, writing help sites, and videos posting tips to get published.
Contact OrangeEnt for info:
maildrop62 at proton dot me Cutting The Cord And Email Security
Moron Meet-Ups
|
« Personal Ad Thread |
Main
| Kerry V. Lieberman Video »
August 20, 2006
MSM On Snakes On A Plane DisappointmentSorry for all the SOAP stuff; this should just about be the last of such posts. "Snakes On a Plane" Fails to Charm, runs the hed. So much for the Internet hype. Really? You think? Let me write that down. "Compelling... premise... or... story... to get... an audience." Hm. Well, it sounds crazy, but it never hurts to get a fresh take, no matter how counterintuitive and "out there." Senior New Line executives were not available for comment. Not a good sign. The project had been in development since 1999, going through several studios, rewrites and directors. It became a cause celebre last year when Jackson publicly assailed New Line for changing the title to the nebulous "Pacific Air 121." Sigh. This is the sort of crap the Ain't It Cool News morons are always pushing -- more tits, more graphic violence. I think I've established my bona fides as being tit and graphic violence friendly, but these morons are just kneejerk geekwads who never stop bleating, "Make it more exxxxxtreme! More gore! More knockers! Now that's storytelling! Exxxxtreme storytelling!" Uh, yeah, whatever. If that was the key to box office success, Friday the 13th Part X: Jason Takes Manhattan would be aheaad of Return of the Jedi on the all-time box office list. Why the hell do they listen to these morons? Has anyone seen Arachnaphobia? This movie was terrifying (despite having no "brown people" in the cast), and it was well-made, and it was funny. Even the character development was interesting, a completely unexpected bonus in a movie about a maurauding army of hybrid Warrior Spiders. And yet-- the violence in it was pretty much limited to spider-squashing. (Not completely, but pretty much.) Really, I don't mean to go all cliche on everyone, but while graphic violence has its uses, it's really the anticipation of violence that gets people in the sense of manipulating emotions. The actual graphic violence elicits a wince by most and an emotionally-disengaged cry of "Yeah Boy, dat was exxxxxtreme!" from fourteen year old retards. I remember reading Ain't It Cool News' gushing, ecstatic preview-review of Rollerball remake. Now, if you've seen this movie, you know it's one of the most inept films of all time, easily in top fifty worst (major release) films in Hollywood history. For reasons unfathomable, there's a six minute chase sequence shot entirely in night-vision film (or made to look that way). And for reasons even more unfathomable, it stars Chris Klein as the Toughest Meanest Kill-Crazy Athlete In the World. And the reviewer's main reason for giving it such a glowing review? It had Rebecca Romaijn's tits and a lot of gore. Look, if I do the Ace of Spades Lifestyle (TM) schtick, I'll say "YEAH!!! BEST MOVIE EVER!!!" about Rollerball too, but, you know, unlike Knowles and crew, I'm joking around. They say that "nobody knows anything in Hollywood," but there is one group who knows less than nothing, and that's the Ain't It Cool jagoffs and the internet geeks in general. Basically, Snakes On A Plane was juiced up with nudity and violence to satisfy a demographic -- fourteen year old boys -- who may see the movie, but they can't actually buy tickets for it, so their ticket sales go not to SOAP's tally but to some random PG movie that just happened to be playing at the same time. To quote Otter from Delta House: Hollywood, you fucked up. You trusted us. | Recent Comments
JackStraw:
">>Yeah, right AfD wants safety and security for it ..."
grammie winger - cheesehead: "He wasn't a Muslim, then? Just a guy who liked to ..." fd: "Mostly peaceful Muslim. Mostly. ..." FenelonSpoke: "He wasn't a Muslim, then? Just a guy who liked to ..." FenelonSpoke: "Posted by: publius, Rascally Mr. Miley (w6EFb) at ..." Gary Cooper: "Timeanddate is very good, you can put your exact l ..." Ciampino - Except exceptionally exempting exhalted examples: "The NZ launch reminds me that on last night's ONT ..." publius, Rascally Mr. Miley (w6EFb): " The German elite want to ban the AfD party. Th ..." Mary Jane Rottencrotch: ">>My ass smells like my ass. Meh.. ..." grammie winger - cheesehead: "Apparently the Christmas Market murderer was a Sau ..." publius, Rascally Mr. Miley (w6EFb): " "Noon" comes from Latin. The Romans originally ..." Ciampino - Except exceptionally exempting exhalted examples: "139 Not the best employees will never be found on ..." Recent Entries
The Classical Saturday Coffee Break & Prayer Revival
Daily Tech News 21 December 2024 Just The ONT, Ma'am Giant Animals Cafe Quick Hits Democrat Strategist Ruy Texiera: The Public Gave the Democrats a Clear Message About Their Rejection of Identity Marxism, But the Democrats Don't Want to Listen Kamala Harris To Be Offered $20 Million in a Media Payoff Disguised as an "Advance" on Book Royalties Plus: Media Makes Excuses for Covering Up Biden's Obvious Senility AGAIN: A Car Plows Through a German Christmas Market at a Very High Speed, Sending People Flying Like Bowling Pins, Killing an Unknown Number David Samuels: Barack Obama Created and Maintains an Echo Chamber Messaging System That Deranges and Perverts People's Thinking Every Day LOL: MSNBC Reportedly Demands That Joy Reid, Stephanie Ruhle Take Pay Cuts to Keep Their Jobs Search
Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Primary Document: The Audio
Paul Anka Haiku Contest Announcement Integrity SAT's: Entrance Exam for Paul Anka's Band AllahPundit's Paul Anka 45's Collection AnkaPundit: Paul Anka Takes Over the Site for a Weekend (Continues through to Monday's postings) George Bush Slices Don Rumsfeld Like an F*ckin' Hammer Top Top Tens
Democratic Forays into Erotica New Shows On Gore's DNC/MTV Network Nicknames for Potatoes, By People Who Really Hate Potatoes Star Wars Euphemisms for Self-Abuse Signs You're at an Iraqi "Wedding Party" Signs Your Clown Has Gone Bad Signs That You, Geroge Michael, Should Probably Just Give It Up Signs of Hip-Hop Influence on John Kerry NYT Headlines Spinning Bush's Jobs Boom Things People Are More Likely to Say Than "Did You Hear What Al Franken Said Yesterday?" Signs that Paul Krugman Has Lost His Frickin' Mind All-Time Best NBA Players, According to Senator Robert Byrd Other Bad Things About the Jews, According to the Koran Signs That David Letterman Just Doesn't Care Anymore Examples of Bob Kerrey's Insufferable Racial Jackassery Signs Andy Rooney Is Going Senile Other Judgments Dick Clarke Made About Condi Rice Based on Her Appearance Collective Names for Groups of People John Kerry's Other Vietnam Super-Pets Cool Things About the XM8 Assault Rifle Media-Approved Facts About the Democrat Spy Changes to Make Christianity More "Inclusive" Secret John Kerry Senatorial Accomplishments John Edwards Campaign Excuses John Kerry Pick-Up Lines Changes Liberal Senator George Michell Will Make at Disney Torments in Dog-Hell Greatest Hitjobs
The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny More Margaret Cho Abuse Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed" Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means Wonkette's Stand-Up Act Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report! Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet The House of Love: Paul Krugman A Michael Moore Mystery (TM) The Dowd-O-Matic! Liberal Consistency and Other Myths Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate "Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long) The Donkey ("The Raven" parody) |