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July 31, 2006

A Few Words for the HQ -- [Ann Coulter]

Folks, it's time to butch up. I know the gap has been widening between you and me for a while now, Ace, but seriously, if this weekend is any indication, it's you moving, sweetheart, not me.

What the eff? - Michael thanking Ace, Mel carping about people's mothers, and Jack's pleading for civility? Did civility pay the bills? Not so I'd notice. Moon Pictures? What is this, romancing the stone? And can we bury the Big Dig already? I've got one word for you DDG - liberal bureaucrats! Is it really that hard to understand? And Ace, all the talk of you quitting smacks of a George Lucas marketing campaign for the re-re-re-re-re-re-re-release of Star Wars.

And to think, just 24 hours ago, someone posted this ...

Wow. I just looked at this weekend’s posts. You guest posters abused this blog like a rented Ace’s sister. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

It's sad when Harrison out-mans everyone here with a Formula 1 post.

Suddenly the AOSHQ has become Oprah's Couch of Loving Kindness. What the hell is wrong with you? Pull yourselves together! Flamewars? You don't deserve them. Haiku? You think it's a shaving gel! John Bolton's Moustache? I know John Bolton's moustache, and you couldn't handle John Bolton's moustache. Pam and Kid Rock getting married? Can't we just revisit Cheney shooting somebody? I feel like Dr. Phil at a Liz Phair concert.

Look, Ace, tell your backup crew to put me some of that sweet Dungeon Master action on here when you take off. Or maybe to blog-war Garfield at Dave's Ridge. Or do a poker tournament. Or post something really hot, like me (NSFW). Or do a follow up on Paul at Wizbang - that was at least the outing of a leech. Manly, huntsman stuff.

Maybe you need to hear John Belushi:

What the eff happened to the Delta I used to know? Where's the spirit? Where's the guts, huh? "Ooh, we're afraid to go with you Bluto, we might get in trouble." Well just kiss my ass from now on! Not me! I'm not gonna take this.

Oh yeah, and regarding this or this, just get off my sweet tits, man. Or I'll be back pull a Cheney.

Note: Ann Coulter didn't really write this. She does approve of the "sweetheart" though.

digg this
posted by Ace at 04:41 PM

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