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Minor Update: Sam Mathews... Not A Puppet | Main | Questions For Mr. Greenwald
July 20, 2006

Why Men Are Stoopid

It's all the woman's fault.


A man's brainpower, scientists say, can be damaged by sharing a bed. When they spend the night with a partner, their sleep patterns are disturbed, whether they make love or not.

This leads to poorer mental agility the next day.

Women do not suffer from the same problem. They have disturbed sleep if they share a bed, but tend to get better quality rest when they do drop off and their brain power remains undiminished.


Nevertheless, married men continue to be the pack-leaders when it comes to the development of edge-cutting fart jokes.

That one where he asks me to 'look for something' under the bedcovers?
A timeless classic, forged in the white-hot dutch oven of matrimonial love.

The findings suggest if a man has an important day ahead he would be best to head off to the spare room rather than share the marital bed.

Oh, HELL no.

Look, I know he'd rather be working on new ideas to improve the particle-accelerator-thingie, but I really need him to scrape and paint the garage door this weekend.

UPDATE: Magical Pat postulates:

The part about not sleeping well affecting your day makes sense. The last thing you want is a woman named margaret who tosses and turns in your bed all night. Nothing worse than Restless Peg Syndrome.

Magical Pat, you deserve to be beaten half to death for that pun. Twice.
Thanks.


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posted by Laura. at 08:26 PM

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