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June 27, 2006

The Case of The Motiveless Mass-Murdering Muslim Maniac

Police are baffled why a man began randomly shooting his co-workers. (NOTE: The headline was chosen for its alliteration, not its accuracy; it doesn't seem as if anyone was actually killed. But "Motiveless Would-Be Mass-Murdering Muslim Maniac" doesn't all start with M's.)

However, Ford’s younger sister Khali told 9News her brother was upset because people were making fun of his religion at work.

“I don’t know what happened to him yesterday. It was like everything changed,” Khali said. “He told me that Allah was going to make a choice and it was going to be good and told me people at his job was making fun of his religion and he didn’t respect that."

You'll be happy to know that police say his religious affiliation is not being considered as a factor in his motive for the assaults. Pretty much they're baffled, and are determined to stay that way.

In related news, Encyclopedia Brown is said to be "positively stumped" in his most recent case, but has "completely ruled out" any involvement by Bugs Meaney.


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posted by Ace at 11:54 AM

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