Real Headline (Honestly!): Cincinnati Crazy For Cornhole

But who isn't, really?

Click if you don't believe me.

Cincinnati crazy for cornhole

...

By Gina Holt
[Cincinnati] Post staff reporter

Fill a bag... hammer... and everyone will go crazy. Crazy for cornhole, that is.

Cornhole, also known as Baggo, is being played by people of all ages in backyards, parks, church festivals and bars. It's a simple game that even children can play. ... Easier to say than do, however. Just ask anyone who has caught the fast-spreading cornhole craze.

A little selective editing never killed anyone. If it's good enough for Maureen Dowd, it's good enough for me.

Let's not get hung up on it being called "Baggo." Or even that Gina Holt is a "staff" reporter. That's just too cheap.

But I'll take this:

Ed Cox, store manager at Dick's Sporting Goods in Florence, Ky., ...started carrying cornhole about a year ago but under the name "Baggo."

For those unfamiliar with the area, Dick's is right behind Butz Plumbing, to the right of Handy's Quality Reach-Arounds.

Thanks to a poster who didn't leave a name, so I'll call her "May."

Rocketeer notes:

Cincinnati has such...strange language and traditions.

Ever order Cincy style chili? First thing they ask is, "How do you want it, three-, four-, or five-way?" Allegedly, it refers to the number of toppings you get on your chili.

What do you make of city where the following sentence is a very real possibility:

"Hey, how about a quickie cornhole while you're waiting for your three-way to come up?"

Cincinnati

Official spiritual capital of the Ace of Spades Lifestyle (TM).

I Got A Feveh... And The Only Prescription Is More Cornhole: Cincinnati should be proud.

World's best-kept secret
West Side's game: Cornhole

...

The obvious question is: Why, then, would anyone want to live in Cincinnati? The answer is simple. Besides baseball, homestyle chili and flying pigs, this city has the World's Best Kept Secret.

It's called Cornhole.

I'm sold. What do apartments run for?

I was terrified about embarking on Summer Adventure No. 6, mostly because a.) Cornhole originated on the West Side of Cincinnati, which is generally any area west of I-75; b.) I am considered an East-Sider because I live east of I-71; and c.) West-Siders eat East-Siders for breakfast.

I don't care who you are, that whole paragraph is just hot.

While the game rages on the West Side, it is creeping eastward with the speed of a distracted tortoise. It must be known that many West-Siders' entire pride is rooted in Cornhole, and the word itself is plastered on restaurant marquees, telephone post signs, bar advertisements and the occasional tattooed arm.

As I drove to Whiteoak's Northside Knights of Columbus Community Benefit Center for my Cornhole debut, I promptly wondered: “Will I make it out alive?,� followed closely by “WHAT IS CORNHOLE?� I brought along my East-Side ally, Danielle Boal of Hyde Park, who also was perplexed about Cornhole and somewhat skeptical of an outing involving neither wine-tasting nor sushi.

Our afternoon tour guide was business manager Jerry Vesper, hereto referred to as “Boomie,� because that is, in fact, his nickname.

"Boomie." I wouldn't play with him, personally.

“Cornhole is big over here because so many different people can play, and men and women can compete against each other equally,� Boomie boomed.

Can they compete equally, though? Color me skeptical. I suppose on defense they might do all right, but I have trouble believing they can score as effectively as men.

Teams of two compete ...; first team to 21 points wins. A hole-in-one counts as three points[.]

Pretty much as I would have guessed.

“That's it?� I asked, relieved. “That's all Cornhole is?�

“Just wait,� said Sharon Linde, manager of Northside's weekly Cornhole leagues. “Once you play, you'll see that it's kind of addictive. But it's really fun.�

You're preachin' to the choir, sister.

And it's not just fun. It's science!

As any student of mechanics will attest, corn hole is a game of vectors, moments of inertia, and trajectories.

Anyone familiar with cornhole will attest to that. Angles are key.

The site includes this joke, too:

"What did Leonardo de Vinci say when he realized how much fun corn hole was?" "Es a tuiza gona bona corna baggi!"

I remember reading that at some point in The DaVinci Code. The real secret of that book? It's all about cornhole.

posted by Ace at 03:53 PM

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