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April 08, 2006
Easter Bunny Shot To Death After Entering Home At Night
"He was carrying what looked like a weapon," homeowner/gun entusiast Frank DiCassi said. "It turned out to be a basket full of boiled eggs and marshmallow chicks, but those could have been placed into a pillowcase to form a deadly improvised club. Well, maybe not deadly, but still, no one wants to get socked in the face with a painted egg."
Actually...
In a tale reminiscent of the last Wallace and Gromit movie, furious villagers in northeast England have hired armed guards to protect their beloved communal vegetable gardens from a suspected monster rabbit.
Leeks, Japanese onions, parsnips and spring carrots have all been ripped up and devoured by the mystery were-rabbit -- prompting the 12 allotment holders in Felton, north of Newcastle, to hire two marksmen with air rifles and orders to shoot to kill.
"It is a massive thing. It is a monster. The first time I saw it, I said: 'What the hell is that?'" the Northumberland Gazette newspaper quoted local resident Jeff Smith, 63, as saying on its website (www.northumberlandtoday.co.uk).
Ultimately, no weapons against it were effective, until finally they consulted the Book of Armaments and used the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch. Police say the Holy Hand Grenade was one of the artifacts carried by Brother Maynard.
The story of the enormous rabbit will be told in an upcoming Samuel L. Jackson action thriller, Bunny On A Bullet Train.