Whatever, I'll Link It

This is one of those stories that is almost certainly complete bullshit but I just can't help myself.

"Monkey boy," raised by monkeys and fed monkey-milk, once covered in hair and his hand curled into monkey-paws, is now, um, a sessions musician with Matchbox 20.

Or something. I don't know. He plays the guitar, it seems. Or at least he clumsily strums it before using it to smash coconuts and sea turtles.

When it comes to food, Sebunnya’s favourites include... meat. According to his friends, Bisaso and Sserubula, when Sebunnya is offered food, he consumes everything even when the amounts are excessive.

“ After meals, he goes to sleep and doesn’t like being disturbed while resting.["]

Good to see he's successfully made the transition from monkey-boy to normal human male.

EXCLUSIVE UPDATE! Must Credit Ace of Spades HQ!

Monkey-boy has been shot by Dick Cheney.

Surprisingly, it wasn't because Cheney mistook him for a monkey. "I just don't like folk guitar," the Vice President said.

He added that he would be attending a James Taylor concert next month, and further added, cryptically, "You will not want to miss the second encore."

posted by Ace at 12:50 PM

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