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January 04, 2006

Mooning Declared Legal In Maryland, Based On "Thong Defense"

Yeah, showing someone your dirty naked ass is about the same as a hot young chick wearing a thong in a (semi) appropriate venue like the beach:

Acquitting a Germantown man who exposed his buttocks during an argument with a neighbor, a Montgomery County Circuit Court judge ruled yesterday that mooning, while distasteful, is not illegal in Maryland.

"If exposure of half of the buttock constituted indecent exposure, any woman wearing a thong at the beach at Ocean City would be guilty," Judge John W. Debelius III said after the bench trial, reversing the ruling of a District Court judge.

...

The case arose from a June 7 argument between the defendant, Raymond Hugh McNealy, 44, and a neighbor, Nanette Vonfeldt. Vonfeldt pressed charges against McNealy after he allegedly yelled and, according to Vonfeldt, threatened to "blow up my building" as she and her 8-year-old daughter walked out of their apartment, in the 20200 block of Shipley Terrace in Germantown.

"Then, for whatever reason, in full view of my daughter, he mooned us," Vonfeldt wrote in a court document.

Is there any way that defense could fly for me? I'm currently fighting some trumped-up sexual battery beef just because I took out my junk at a Bennigan's and used it to slap this supercillious waiter named "Chip." Gave that button-suspenders nachos-bitch a good dork-whap right in the frigging temple.

And, in a way, that's really no different than a woman breastfeeding her child in public... and then slapping you in the head with one of her mommysacs. And really, isn't that what America is all about?

Thanks to JackStraw.


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posted by Ace at 10:12 AM

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