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September 03, 2005

Kanye West: "George Bush Doesn't Care About Black People"

A video clip that's sad, infuriating, and funny at the same time, from the disaster relief telethon.

Kanye West (a rapper, I'm told) regurgitates all the goofy shit he's been reading on left-wing blogs and hearing on conspriacy-mongering black radio while Mike Myers attempts to just read the teleprompter. Myers' reaction, or non-reaction, really, is pretty funny.

The really sad thing is that it's evident that this country's politics are deathly sick from paranoiac poison and I'm not sure it will ever be better. I think blogs have something to do with this, sadly.

Life Imitates Saturday Night Live Update: Anyone remember that hilarious sketch where Mike Myers and Heather Locklear were pitchmen for a pasta-maker being sold on an infomercial, and Heather Locklear kept making the vilest (read, "funniest") racial slurs in attempting to hype the past-maker?

And Mike Myers kept wincing every time she'd say something like "You'd have to be drunker than an Indian to pass up this offer" or "It's so inexpensive that even a Puerto Rican can afford it"?

That was strangely similar to the Meyers/West pitch.

The transcript of that sketch is here, but I really wish I could find video of it. Both Myers and especially Heather Locklear were hilarious.

Locklear really sold that racism, with these big smiles and crazy-eyes.

A bit of the sketch:

Richard Hayden [Myers]: ... I'm going to demonstrate my pasta-maker for you and your audience. Do you think your audience would like that?

[ the audience claps ]

Janet Miles [Heather Locklear]: This I have to see! Now, this is a complicated process. Right, Richard?

Richard Hayden: No. My pasta-maker is easy to operate, because the directions are easy to follow.

Janet Miles: Well, we've heard that before: you buy an appliance with easy-to-follow directions, and you get it home, and you need a Ph.D to figure it out. Usually, this "easy direction" stuff is a big lie.. like the Holocaust! [ the phones ring wild, and the bulbs light up on the map ] Now, are your directions really easy to follow? Or is it just another Holocaust-type scam?

Richard Hayden: [ dumbfounded by Janet's statements ] Uh.. they're, uh.. they're, uh.. easy to follow.. they, uh.. involve, uh.. three easy steps..

Janet Miles: Well, does the audience want to see these three easy steps to good-tasting pasta?

[ the audience relunctantly claps ]

Richard Hayden: O..kay.. Well, you just pour in the flour.. [ pours in the flour ] ..the egg and water mix.. [ pours in the egg and water ] ..and that's it. Hit the button, and look. Here comes the pasta [ pasta starts coming out of the machine ].

Janet Miles: [ excited ] So incredible! And so fast! Well, let's take some phone calls! I'm sure people want to find out more about this amazing machine! Caller, you're on "Timesavers"!

Caller #1: [ shaken ] Are you insane?! Did you just say that the Holocaust was a lie?!

Janet Miles: Listen.. there is no way of ever knowing if the Holocaust actually happened. But we do know this is an amazing pasta-maker. Next caller. You're on "Timesaver"!

What About Robert Byrd? Update: The Therapist has an exclusive about Byrd's conflicted emotions about aiding black folks.


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posted by Ace at 11:25 AM

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