Wednesday Morning Rant

Imagine that you are a leader in one of America's large cities, and - in a surprise to nobody, because it's the norm - that city is a hellhole and getting worse. What would you work on? Facing the monumental task of managing a major city that appears to be stuck in an inescapable spiral of decline, what would you do? Would you try to tackle one or more major problems or try to improve quality of life for the residents?

Well, we know the answer in at least one case: no, of course not. The city in question is my former home town of Denver, Colorado. Denver, like all major cities and especially wholly-owned Party cities, is not exactly doing well. It's by no means the worst major city in the country, but it's working manfully to close the gap.

If you're a problem-solver - real or merely aspirational - Denver should represent nirvana for you. There is opportunity aplenty for improvement in that once-fair city. Where to begin? You could try to roust and suppress the sprawling camps of vagrants that have been a continuous presence for years. If that seems like too much of a hot button issue, you could try to "move the needle" on "public safety" more generally, since the dangers of everyday city life are escalating, and crime rates haven't exactly been a bright spot. Maybe the big social problems aren't for you. You could go after something comparatively simple, like addressing the city's declining and undersized infrastructure. Maybe, if you're feeling really ambitious, you could try some aggressive enforcement to go after the fentanyl problem rather than just advising people not to dope up by themselves.

But that's all pretty hard. Like all failing cities, Denver needs a marketing push - a big distraction from those hard problems. What better option than courting a large, Party-friendly, identity-movement aligned, exclusive event for a minority population that will never provide a return on investment? We're getting close to something really promising now. There is just such an event, and Denver is in estrus trying to attract it. It isn't soon, but it will really put Denver on the map for things that matter. That event is the "Gay Games."

An international athletic contest by, for and consisting of homosexuals. This is the kind of inclusivity for which we should all strive. I didn't know that homosexuals needed their own games because they were banned from the real Olympics and other contests, but I guess you learn something every day. But why Denver? What makes Denver such a great choice for the international homosexual athletic contest? Why, "urban sophistication" and "empowerment," of course:

Urban sophistication meets outdoor adventure in Denver, where the bid for the 2030 Gay Games represents more than a global event; it's a symbol of progress and inclusivity. Denver, recognized as the #5 spot on AAA's Top 50 cities list, aspires to captivate a wide audience with the electrifying spirit of the Gay Games, aligning seamlessly with founder Tom Waddell's vision of an ever-expanding community. The city's rich history of successfully hosting LGBTQ+ events, combined with its commitment to diversity and inclusion, sets the stage for a transformative experience.

World-class attractions. Natural wonders. A thriving arts scene. Dozens of innovative and acclaimed restaurants. Nightlife options galore. The word is getting out - Denver's got it all.

In a city plagued with Progressive ailments, the city's leadership focuses on nonsense like plastic bag bans and international athletic contests of homosexual prowess. The latter should really help with the medical capacity crisis, too.

It's clear that Denver has its priorities straight.

posted by Joe Mannix at 11:00 AM

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