Monday Overnight Open Thread (12/11/23)

Quote I

Some scientists claim that hydrogen, because it is so plentiful, is the basic building block of the universe. I dispute that. I say there is more stupidity than hydrogen, and that is the basic building block of the universe. Frank Zappa

Quote II

“The people who are happiest with us are those who need parts for old guns that just aren’t made anymore.” Scott Reed, Gunbusters

Quote III

“I have a guest book. People write in it. I had a bad year this year. This brought joy. I know kids are going to love it, but I really enjoy it when I see adults that get a real kick out of it.” Michael Russell, Homeowner Rose Hill, KS

Quote IV

“He’s been with us through our first home, our forever home, marriage, having a baby. Been with us through everything,” Danielle Hagan, the wife of Officer Chad Hagan, Igor’s former handler.

'Tis the season for seasonal drinks or something like that.

Creative cocktail recipes for 15 festive drinks—and two punches that pack a punch—from award-winning bartenders around the world.

Whether your idea of holiday spirit involves whiskey, gin, tequila or rum, having a festive cocktail to serve them in always makes the season a little merrier. The 17 recipes in this year’s Forbes Holiday Cocktail Guide were created by award-winning bartenders from New York to Norway. With ingredients that celebrate classic winter flavors and scents (and a few that magically transport you to the tropics), many of these drinks are meant to evoke nostalgic memories. And if you mix them up just right, you might even make some new ones.

And you Liz Cheney are an existential threat to the Buffet Industry as we know it.

Former Rep. Liz Cheney (R-WY) said Sunday on ABC’s “This Week” that her main focus was on defeating former President Donald Trump because he is an “existential threat.”

Cheney said, “Neither party has selected their nominee yet. It looks like it’s most likely to be Donald Trump and Joe Biden, but we don’t know that for sure. I think it’s going to require making an assessment about sort of how we can most effectively mobilize people in both parties and mobilize independents frankly to stand against Donald Trump. I think, you know, there’s a lot that has to be done to begin to rebuild the Republican Party, potentially to rebuild a new conservative party, but in my view, that has to wait until after the 2024 election because our focus has got to be on defeating Donald Trump.”?

Pappa Dick, take her pheasant hunting.

Remember, The ONT IS Always Looking Out For You^TM

Watch out! These are the most gator-infested lakes in Florida
Lake George, Lake Jesup listed in top 5

With over 1 million alligators estimated to live in Florida, it’s not a surprise to find one living in a body of water near you.

However, some lakes carry more alligators than others.

What can you buy in California?

A. [ ] 2 Stroke Leaf Blower
B. [ ] Gas Range
C. [ ] Gendered Toys
D. [X] None of The Above

The latest woke California insanity? A gender-neutral-toy law

California is facing a crime crisis across its major cities, a population exodus driven by high taxes and woke policies, and a host of other thorny problems.

Naturally, Golden State lawmakers opted to focus on the urgent issue of not enough gender-neutral toys.

Yes, California retail stores with more than 500 employees will soon face fines for failing to offer “gender-neutral” toy sections, thanks to a law kicking in Jan. 1.

Makes perfect sense!

Aside from the fact that nothing now stops any parent from buying any kid any toy (in the family price range) he or she wants.

I guess the State of California has eliminated all of those pesky housing and power grid issues to only mention two.

The following story does not shock or surprise me.

High School Teacher Shocked Her Students Don't Know How to Read an Analog Clock

A High School teacher said that she stopped her English lesson after learning some of her students couldn't tell time.

Get the flock ram out of here.

BOULDER, Colo. (KDVR) — A bighorn sheep got stuck on top of a Colorado house before it finally made its way to the ground a day and a half later, according to wildlife officials.

The Colorado Parks and Wildlife (CPW) Northeast Region said the incident happened in Boulder on Tuesday. The agency posted images of the animal on X, formerly Twitter, and said, “This is not the type of clatter you want to hear on your roof during December.”

Don't tell me what I want to hear on my roof in December.

Hmmm, go figure. Taylor Swift is dumped.

After Back-To-Back Losses, Chiefs Replace Taylor Swift With Selena Gomez

KANSAS CITY, MO — With back-to-back losses following last night's disappointing defeat at the hands of the Buffalo Bills, the Kansas City Chiefs have made a roster move, opting to swap out Taylor Swift for Selena Gomez.

"We just felt it was time to make a change," said Chiefs Head Coach Andy Reid. "We still feel Taylor is a nice girl and she's a strong contributor, and we appreciate everything she's done to help the team, but this league is about results. We think it's time to get someone else in there to see what they can do. We're happy to have Selena."

There is a time and place for your "Pissed Off Voice". This was not one of those.
Genius Award Winner.

SARASOTA, Fla. (WWSB) - A Sarasota County deputy on a traffic stop soon turned away to deal with much bigger problems.

On Dec. 1, a Sarasota County deputy was finishing up a routine traffic stop, writing a written warning in lieu of giving a ticket, when 69-year-old Alexandru Stan came up and began beating his fists against her window. The man said that he lived in the apartment complex where the deputy was conducting the traffic stop, and that the deputy needed to leave so that he could get out. In contrast, the deputy told him that she was doing her job; he needed to leave.

Stan refused.

He stepped chest-to-chest with the deputy, yelling and pointing his finger in her face The deputy grabbed his wrist and shirt and tried to put him in handcuffs, but Stan denied her, going so far as the strike the deputy to try and break free.

This guy excels at his seasonal gig. Tonight's Feel Good Story of The Day.

A Mom Whispered To Santa That Her Son Is Blind And Autistic

A heartwarming tale unfolded during a magical visit to Santa's workshop.

A California mother shared a touching post about her son that has warmed the hearts of many.

"I whispered to Santa 'he is blind and autistic and is very interested in Santa'. He said 'say no more' and immediately got down on the floor to greet my little man," Theresa Hudson wrote in a Facebook post.

What followed was a beautiful interaction that transcended words.

"He talked to Matthew for a long time. Let him feel all over him. Told him to pull his beard, feel his hat and talked about his red suit," she continued.


Top 10 commenters:
1 [787 comments] 'jim (in Kalifornia)' [110.49 posts/day]
2 [453 comments] 'Joe Mannix (Not a cop!)'
3 [413 comments] 'Bulgaroctonus'
4 [396 comments] 'runner'
5 [394 comments] 'Sponge - F*ck Joe Biden'
6 [334 comments] 'Archimedes'
7 [333 comments] 'BurtTC'
8 [329 comments] 'Tom Servo'
9 [313 comments] '18-1'
10 [295 comments] 'Alberta Oil Peon'

Top 10 sockpuppeteers:
1 [236 names] 'Ciampino - Burglars wear sneakers' [33.13 unique names/day]
2 [184 names] 'Miklos Johnson'
3 [87 names] 'Bon Vivant'
4 [61 names] 'Quarter Twenty '
5 [60 names] 'Leka Miklos-Zogu I, TRUE KING OF ALL THE ALBANIAS'
6 [59 names] 'Moron Analyst'
7 [54 names] '18-1'
8 [48 names] 'A lot of Christianity is pretty weak sauce these days'
9 [35 names] 'jim (in Kalifornia)'
10 [34 names] 'I reject this, I won't vote for it'

Tonight's ONT has been brought to you by Common Sense Problem Solvers.

Notice: Posted with permission by the Ace Media Empire & AceCorp, LLC. No hamsters were injured in the production of The ONT.

posted by Misanthropic Humanitarian at 09:55 PM

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