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October 02, 2023
Insurrectionist Who Obstructed an Official Act of Congress Jamaal Bowman: I Know Who the Real Fire-Alarm Activtor Was -- "Nazi Republicans"
Kick this motherfucker out and prosecute him.
If you didn't hear about it, Jamaal Bowman pulled a fire alarm to stop a vote on the debt deal.
He then lied and claimed he thought that a fire alarm opened doors.
Bowman's press secretary, Emma Simon, said the signs confused him. "Congressman Bowman did not realize he would trigger a building alarm as he was rushing to make an urgent vote. The Congressman regrets any confusion," she said, according to Axios' Andrew Solender.
But the signs that perplexed Bowman were deemed to be readable at a third-grade level, according to readabilityformulas.com's Automated Readability Index.
"Today as I was rushing to make a vote, I came to a door that is usually open for votes but today would not open," Bowman, the founder and former principal of a public middle school in the Bronx, said in a statement. "I am embarrassed to admit that I activated the fire alarm, mistakenly thinking it would open the door. I regret this and sincerely apologize for any confusion this caused," he continued.
He knows who's to blame for his profound learning disability, however -- Republican "Nazis."
Democratic Rep. Jamaal Bowman sent out a list of talking points for his colleagues Monday blaming Republican "Nazi[s]" after he set off a fire alarm as the House of Representatives was in the process of approving a spending bill to avoid a government shutdown, according to a memo.
Republicans called for Bowman's impeachment after he was caught on camera hitting a fire alarm during a crucial vote on a funding package Saturday, despite his claims that it was an accident. Bowman's office distributed a memo to fellow Democrats, with suggested talking points on the "extreme reach" of "MAGA Republicans" and the "Nazi members" of the GOP, according to the document.
"I believe Congressman Bowman when he says this was an accident," one of the prompts reads. "Republicans need to instead focus their energy on the Nazi members of their party before anything else."
The memo was first reported by Politico.
Another talking point claimed that there are "multiple insurrectionist supporters in Congress" and that focus on Bowman was designed to "minimize January 6th," according to the memo. Several points blamed the GOP for trying to "distract from the fact" that they almost "shut down the federal government for no reason."
Bowman argued in a statement Saturday that the signs for the doors leading to the House floor had confused him, leading to him flipping the wrong switch. The signs in question read "Emergency Exit Only" and "Push Until Alarm Sounds."
"Today as I was rushing to make a vote, I came to a door that is usually open for votes but today would not open," Bowman said. "I am embarrassed to admit that I activated the fire alarm, mistakenly thinking it would open the door. I regret this and sincerely apologize for any confusion this caused," he continued.
In the District of Columbia, it is illegal for any individual to "willfully or knowingly give a false alarm of fire," according to district law. As a result, Bowman could potentially face a misdemeanor charge and be sentenced to up to six months in prison with a fine of no more than $100.
Either this motherfucker goes to jail or every J6er gets released from prison and paid $10,000 for each day they were detained.
Breitbart reports he was spotted pulling signs down before pulling the alarm. Possibly attempting to prepare a defense before committing the crime.
Someone pointed out this this confessedly-stupid ignorant man used to " " " teach " " " public school. He spent years " " " working " " " in a government school but is mystified about the function of a fire alarm?
"The View" has figured out what really happened:
Just like They did to Brother O.J.!
"I don't want to call it a stunt yet. There's going to be an investigation," Sunny Hostin said. "I know Jamaal, and so again, I'm a little biased, but the doors that are normally open so that he could get to the chambers to read were somehow miraculously closed. How did that happen?"
"Sometimes you're freaking out and you're in an elevator and you're pressing all the buttons," Hostin continued.
So you're saying he's a very low-IQ individual with essentially animal intelligence?
The Bee: