Intermarkets' Privacy Policy
Support


Donate to Ace of Spades HQ!


Contact
Ace:
aceofspadeshq at gee mail.com
Buck:
buck.throckmorton at protonmail.com
CBD:
cbd at cutjibnewsletter.com
joe mannix:
mannix2024 at proton.me
MisHum:
petmorons at gee mail.com
J.J. Sefton:
sefton at cutjibnewsletter.com


Recent Entries
Absent Friends
Bandersnatch 2024
GnuBreed 2024
Captain Hate 2023
moon_over_vermont 2023
westminsterdogshow 2023
Ann Wilson(Empire1) 2022
Dave In Texas 2022
Jesse in D.C. 2022
OregonMuse 2022
redc1c4 2021
Tami 2021
Chavez the Hugo 2020
Ibguy 2020
Rickl 2019
Joffen 2014
AoSHQ Writers Group
A site for members of the Horde to post their stories seeking beta readers, editing help, brainstorming, and story ideas. Also to share links to potential publishing outlets, writing help sites, and videos posting tips to get published. Contact OrangeEnt for info:
maildrop62 at proton dot me
Cutting The Cord And Email Security
Moron Meet-Ups






















« Baby Goat Rodeo Cafe | Main | Daily Tech News 26 May 2023 »
May 25, 2023

From The Halls of Montezuma To The Shores Of ONT

Hey, good evening folks! Nice to see all of you fine people here for our little ONT. I gotta tell you, isn't Ace of Spades wild? Lots of great stuff here. Anyone had a chance to visit the Baby Goat Rodeo Cafe yet? * wait for applause * Anyhow, we got a great show for you tonight, if everyone could just complete this Captcha, we'll get right to the content!


Theseus captcha.jpg


Tonight's Question

This was a conversation on the bird app.

If you had to leave the US and live in another country for the rest of your life (legally, of course), what country would you choose and why?

Italy might be nice. Perhaps Japan, but I would have the knowledge that I'd always be a gaijin, no matter how long I lived there. I might also give (cold war baby me just rolled over in his grave) Eastern Europe a look. Poland seems to get it.

Poland egts it.jpg

So how about you?


I Open With A Pair Of American Bad-Asses


Samuel Whittemore, the American Revolution’s Oldest Lion


As the British forces were retreating from Concord, a British relief force was approaching. Samuel Whittemore left his fields and loaded a musket and grabbed his two dueling pistols the sword he had taken from the French officer. When the British troops approached his farm, he crouched behind his stonewall. 

The skirmishers on the flanks soon came within range. He raised his musket and killed a British soldier. Then, drawing his pistols, he killed another soldier while mortally wounding a third. Whittemore then tried to produce his sword, but the British troops were on him quickly. One soldier shot him in the face, while others bayonetted him half a dozen times and clubbed him with rifle butts. They left the old farmer in a pool of blood. 

After the British moved off, colonial Minutemen found Whittemore trying to reload his weapons. His family rushed him to the Cooper Tavern. There Dr. Nathaniel Tufts, of nearby Medford, who attended to him said he wouldn’t survive his wounds.

But Samuel Whittemore proved everyone wrong.


Whittemore.jpeg



We are lesser sons of greater fathers.


Texians Would Like A Word


This Page Is Full Of Stories About Texians

Like this one, from the Battle of San Jacinto:

Houston's plan on the day of battle was to deceive the Mexican sentinels in to thinking that the gringo army was embarking on a sort of drill. His intemperate instructions (he was noted or his profanity) was to play something the Texans knew, but which the Mexicans wouldn't take as aggressive. So the "Davis boys" (as they were called, though they were father and son) played a crude love song---what should have been a waltz---at an awkward march tempo. The ragged troops lined up in two files behind the fiddlers and trod slowly in front of the Mexican lines just out of gunshot range, moving from left to right in a parody of a poorly staged parade drill. The officers were on horseback, on either side of the line, and tried to keep the men in order. The strains of the then-popular frontier love song (which was based on an older English tune) "Will You Come to the Bower?" was scraped out by the Davis men, and the long columns started from a clump of trees and proceeded (with many of the men snickering and cursing even though Houston had ordered shot anyone who did not keep quiet) to another grove of trees and brush nearer to the Mexican camp on its right. It was done to resemble an awkward exercise and was interpreted that way by the Mexican lookouts. But upon reaching the far grove of trees, the columns halted and turned right to face the Mexican encampment. The officers behind the line had orders to shoot anyone who turned and ran. The fiddlers did not advance with the column, but stayed where they were told at the tree line, playing over and over the same retrains from the simple song they had often played many times before at more pleasant events. They were not near the two cannon, which were near the center of the line, and according to the family story there was neither fife nor drum present with the colonists.

So at San Jacinto, one of the most lopsided victories that the North American continent has ever seen, and the decisive battle that won Texas its independence, the Texians charged the Mexicans to this blood stirring martial tune:


Education

But kids today don't learn about heroes like Whittemore or Miller, or about the heroics at San Jacinto, and that's not an accident.

Don’t Know Much About History

Referred to as the Nation’s Report Card, the NAEP is a test that measures the knowledge of American students in various areas. The most recent results reveal that a pitiful 13 percent of eighth-graders met proficiency standards for U.S. history – “proficiency” meaning they could “explain major themes, periods, events, people, ideas and turning points in the country’s history.” Only about 20 percent of students scored at or above the proficient level in civics. Both scores are all-time lows for these two tests.


Sand rightly concludes, “So instead of learning factual American history—the good and the bad—students are now at the mercy of far-left advocates pushing a radical racial and sexual agenda. Unless the education establishment reverses course in a hurry, parents, already responsible for feeding, clothing, and housing their children, will need to educate them as well.”

Yes. Yes they do.


A Little Humor


The Most Honest Marine Corps Joke of All Time

A U.S. Marine General was about to start the morning briefing to his staff. While waiting for the coffee machine to finish brewing, the General decided to pose a question to all assembled. He explained that his wife had been a bit frisky the night before and he failed to get his usual amount of sound sleep. He posed the question of just how much of sex was “work” and how much of it was “pleasure?”

Read the rest at the link.

Does The ONT Have Room For A Soviet Hero?

I think so. Without him, we might not be here.


Unusual Weapon


Pneumatic Dynamite Gun


The great American pneumatic gun is described by a visitor to Shoeburyness as capable of throwing a shell having a charge of 600lb of dynamite. it resembles a huge telescope, pointing upward, at an angle of 30 degrees and is 70ft long. The shots discharged by the gun, it is added, were carried a mile and a half, and every one is described as having fallen within the space of the floor of a large public hall.

Sounds good, but in practice it didn't work so well.

Sad News

David Brandt, farmer behind viral ‘it’s honest work’ meme, dies in car crash

You may be familiar with the meme:

Honest work.jpg

Well, there was a lot more to Brandt than just the meme. He was an interesting guy.

For farmer Dave Brandt, being a meme is honest work

Good read.

Tonight's ONT has been brought to you by really good windshield wipers:

digg this
posted by WeirdDave at 10:00 PM

| Access Comments




Recent Comments
[i]Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars (TM)[/b][/i][/s][/u]: " James Earl Carter was a meddlesome twat ... The ..."

scampydog: "June Lockhart in Lassie. What the hell is wrong ..."

Citizen Cake: ">>>The natural gas thing was among the regionally ..."

SMOD: "On July 15, 1979, then president Jimmy Carter went ..."

blake - semi lurker in marginal standing (tT6L1): "Young gals in pj's at the store I sort of get. Guy ..."

The ARC of History!: "[i]What kind of mean shit can the executive branch ..."

Thomas Bender: "@311 >>For details, see the Law & Order episode ..."

TheJamesMadison, trying to figure out Joel Schumacher: "332 Decency, yet Biden fingerbanged a staffer. Po ..."

naturalfake: "[i]Airline deregulation gave us people wearing paj ..."

Quarter Twenty : "268 Why do I suspect Biden's "eulogy" will involve ..."

eleven: "They'll try to rub the Carter funeral ball sack i ..."

Sponge - F*ck Joe Biden: "Decency, yet Biden fingerbanged a staffer. ..."

Recent Entries
Search


Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64