Saturday Overnight Open Thread (2/26/22)

And then the bear lowered his paw, bowed his head and spoke: "Lord, bless this food which I am about to receive and for which I am truly thankful, Amen." (H/T Legally Sufficient)

Producing an ONT 5 nights a week is an interesting hobby. It's also interesting and informative.THE UNDERGROUND WORLD OF BOWLING LEAGUE GAMBLING - You might be borrowing shoes, but if you’re playing the game right, you’re also taking home cash

When Connor joined a bowling league last year, he didn’t realize that also meant he would soon become a gambling man. But for the 33-year-old Chicagoan, walking into Diversey River Bowl that first time was like walking into a casino full of guys drinking in their socks.

I recently priced out flight prices for the Fabulous Mrs. Mis. Hum. and myself to Australia. Price was about $16,000. This looks like a much better deal.

This Is What A $28,000 First Class Trip Around The World Looks Like

What is a Saturday ONT without a penis story. Hey, it's not Ukraine.

An Iranian man was left unable to urinate and in need of skin graft surgery after getting an AA battery lodged in his penis.

The 49-year-old patient, who has not been named, went to hospital in Tehran in April 2021, where he told doctors the object had been stuck for 24 hours.

Medics were able to prise the battery out without surgery and discharge the man on the same day — but he was forced to return months later in pain.

And here I go squeamish when I see the catheter commercials on late night TV.

If I were drive a big unheated yellow tube, you are damn straight I wouldn't be passing any tox screen.

Washington state regulators found more than 600 safety and procedural violations by school bus carrier First Student in the past two years, dozens of which persisted for years after company officials were warned of the infractions.

The company repeatedly failed to screen drivers for drugs and alcohol, cleared employees to drive before they’d even completed an application for employment or a history of their driving records, provided false information on driver records and allowed some vehicles to continue running even when seats weren’t securely attached, according to a complaint from the state’s Utilities and Transportation Commission.

First Student, which provides daily school bus and charter service in Seattle, Tacoma, Vashon Island and several other school districts in Washington state, could pay up to the maximum fine of $364,000, depending on the outcome of a hearing next month.

Oh lighten up it's a joke, I would have zipped tied and used duct tape on those little bastards while I was sober.

What a catch!

To be honest, I’d had better evenings.

Two hours of stilted conversation over rubbery haddock in lukewarm, milky fish juice at a seafood restaurant somewhere on the Kent coast was, frankly, two hours too much.

My date’s rehearsed soundbites about his job in dental sales made me want to stick a fork in my eye and the frequent awkward silences came as a blessed relief.

As he regaled me with another story about shifting two hundred oral suction pumps to a hygienist in Jaywick, I determined to never swipe right again for a man whose eyebrows join in the middle.

Just a simple observation. If educators teachers are so damn smart why do we hear about this on a regular basis? An Ohio teacher was removed from the classroom after her alleged sex tape was sent to hundreds of students.

The incident reportedly occurred Feb. 7 at Ginn Academy, an all-boys public school located in east Cleveland. According to local outlets, the explicit video was originally stored on the teacher’s mobile device and AirDropped to more than 200 students with iPhones. According to FOX 8 News, the teacher claimed she had heard rumors of a circulating sex tape featuring her and her boyfriend; however, she told police she doesn’t know how the video was released. Authorities also noted that there were four to five videos that were sent on Feb. 7, but only one of them is believed to contain sexual content.

“If somebody were to have access to an unattended phone, its fairly easy to capture someone’s passcode,” Alex Hamerstone of TrustedSec Cyber Security told WKYC. “If someone has bad intentions, the first thing they’ll do when they get access to your phone is look through your pictures, look to see if you have a private folder and see what’s in there, or look at text messages and try to find something inappropriate.”

Pretty difficult to do with payphones and mimeograph machines. Get off my lawn.

Born on this day: February 26th 1928 - Fats Domino
Fats Domino, (Antoine Domino), singer, pianist, bandleader, songwriter. Domino attracted national attention with his first recording, ‘The Fat Man’, made in late 1949 for Imperial Records, an early rock-and-roll record. ‘The Fat Man’ sold one million copies by 1953 and it is widely considered the first rock-and-roll record to achieve this feat. Domino had 35 records in the US Billboard Top 40. Domino died on 24 October 2017 aged 89 at his home in Harvey, Louisiana after a long-term illness. via thisdayinmusic.com

Born on this day: February 26th 1932 - Johnny Cash
Johnny Cash US country singer, songwriter who was considered one of the most influential musicians of the 20th century. Although he is remembered as a country icon, his songs spanned other genres including rock and roll and rockabilly and blues, folk, and gospel. This crossover appeal won Cash the rare honour of induction in the Country Music Hall of Fame, the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, and the Gospel Music Hall of Fame. During the last stage of his career, Cash covered songs by several late 20th-century rock artists, most notably 'Hurt' by Nine Inch Nails. Cash died of respiratory failure on September 12th 2003, aged 71. via thisdayinmusic.com

Communication is the key, unless you are a Genius Award Winner.

Battery Victim Initially Thought His Girlfriend Was "Being Rough Like '50 Shades Of Grey'"

A Florida Man told police that he thought his girlfriend was “being rough like ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’” when she began to slap him yesterday, but he eventually fled the couple’s apartment when the woman became more aggressive and left him “seeing stars” with a bump on his head, according to an arrest report.

Cops say after Nicole Onque, 21, and the 40-year-old victim returned to their Largo home early Monday morning after attending a festival, the pair argued when Onque was unable to locate her phone.

Though she would eventually find the device, Onque “was still upset.” The victim “attempted to sit at his desk and ignore the defendant,” an officer noted.

Tonight's ONT has been brought to you by Going The Extra Inch.

Notice: Posted with permission by the Ace Media Empire, AceCorp, LLC and the North Dakota Coffee Brewer's Association. Whose motto is moar coffee and less whine.

posted by Misanthropic Humanitarian at 10:03 PM

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