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| Quick Hits: Almost Entirely Visual Edition »
December 07, 2021
Quick Hits![]() ![]() Aww. Makes you think -- she was just two years older than we pretend to be. The great-grandmum was the first giraffe calf to be born at the zoo in 1990. If cats were people, they'd be psychopaths, scientists say. Notice the headline is not "We've discovered cancer, scientists say." Researchers at the UK's University of Liverpool and Liverpool John Moores University surveyed pet owners to rate their cats' level of psychopathy -- as defined by human psychological standards. Wow, so much Sciencing. And what does all of this mean? What important conclusions can be drawn from this Study?
Oh. Oh. God Bless you all in your work. In Women Posting Their W's Online news, one pluckly lass is just absolutely shredding the women's swimming records at the University of Pennsylvania. And what's more -- she's new at being a woman! She just started being a woman last year! Talk about a prodigy! Lia Thomas, 22, smashed two U.S. swimming records at an Akron, Ohio contest Imagine how good he'd be at women's swimming if he'd been doing it his whole life!
So she dreamt up a scheme: She would post online about her imaginary, made-up wedding, which she thought would spur her former boyfriend to desperately contact her and beg her to dump the man she just married to date her former boyfriend. The plan, while obviously brilliant and Full of Win, did not go as intended. Woman reveals she FAKED her own wedding - complete with lavish venue, stand-in groom, and a professional photoshoot - in a desperate attempt to get her ex to text her, only for him to IGNORE the faux matrimony ![]() Is this all just an elaborate pitch for Ryan Reynolds' next movie? The video her confessing her plan is here. But it's easier to see in the slideshow at the Daily Mail. She's kind of cute. Thicc German girl. Thicker than a bowl of oatmeal. She's obviously insane but that might have some advantages, at least for a couple of weeks. Not sure why she's having trouble finding dates. Maybe this is all a lie and she's just playing two dimensional chess to get attention, making up a story about a made-up wedding. (Influencers are operating at absolute peak if they play two dimensional chess.) I heard about this on the Boyscast. They had a guest, An0maly (his spelling not mine), who said something like, "I'd like to have workshopped this plan with her beforehand. Like, best case scenario, he contacts you and you call off your pretend wedding, but now he's with a woman who he thinks cheats on her honeymoon if someone just DMs her 'u up?' on Twitter. We can do better than that. Let's brainstorm. There are no bad ideas, except for the original one you had about the fake wedding." Actually he just said the "workshop" thing and pointed out how bad the plan was. But those were good things to say.
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