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January 29, 2021

Ellen Page -- Who Now Calls Herself "Elliot" -- Files For Divorce From Her Lesbian Wife

Well, she was a lesbian married to a lesbian, now she's a "man" married to lesbian, which makes her no longer lesbian.

So I guess it's time for a divorce?

Look, I don't know. "Love is love," that's what they tell me I must repeat upon prompting.

A storybook romance ends.

Amid 'joy' of transgender announcement, Elliot Page files for divorce from wife

Move comes two months after he announced he is transgender


In a joint statement, Page and his wife, Emma Portner, said they had been separated since last summer and suggested the split is amicable.

"After much thought and careful consideration, we have made the difficult decision to divorce following our separation last summer," the pair said in a statement issued to People. "We have the utmost respect for each other and remain close friends."

The divorce papers were filed in Manhattan, TMZ reported. When Page announced their surprise wedding in 2018, he wrote on Instagram: "Can't believe I get to call this extraordinary woman my wife."

Oh noes, I was really rooting for these kids to make it.

And speaking of failed actresses who now mostly just troll social media to get attention:

Lena Dunham (@lenadunham)

I cannot wait to spend holidays at the White House when I am Hunter Biden's beautiful wife.

Yes, that would be something, Lena. Three things, though: 1, you need to become beautiful first, 2, you need to become a crack dealer, and 3, you need to de-age yourself down to 14 years old.

It might also help if you let China open up an energy company in your cooch.

And remember, "the Big Guy" gets 10%, right off the top.

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posted by Ace at 03:05 PM

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