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« Saturday Evening Movie Thread 07-11-2020 [Moviegique] | Main | EMT 7/12/20 »
July 11, 2020

Saturday Overnight Open Thread (7/11/20)

sat711200nt.jpg


***


The Saturday Night Joke


The Urinal Is Too High:


A group of 3rd, 4th, and 5th graders, accompanied by two female teachers, went on a field trip to the local racetrack, (Churchill Downs ) to learn about thoroughbred horses and the supporting industry (Bourbon), but mostly to see the horses.

When it was time to take the children to the bathroom, it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the other.

The teacher assigned to the boys was waiting outside the men's room when one of the boys came out and told her that none of them could reach the urinal.

Having no choice, she went inside, helped the boys with their pants, and began hoisting the little boys up one by one, holding on to their little 'wee-wees' to direct the flow away from their clothes.

As she lifted one little guy, she couldn't help but notice that he was unusually well endowed. Trying not to show that she was staring, the teacher said, "You must be in the 5th grade.”

"No ma'am he replied, "I'm riding Silver Arrow in the seventh race, but I appreciate your help."


***

So I wonder where all the money comes from for "his treatments"? Tattoos and parts removal gone wild.

Adam Curlykale started tattooing his entire body after he survived cancer.

Adam Curlykale got his first tattoo when he was 20-years-old. It was a small two-word, three-letter message on his arm: “I am.”

Curlykale, now 32, has undergone a major transformation. In the 12 years since that first tattoo, he’s tattooed almost his entire body (at least 90 percent of it) – including his face and eyeballs – with jet black ink. He has several body piercings as well.

***

It is Saturday night. It's the weekend. And it's time for some lighthearted ONT material. After all this is the interwebz. 30 People Share “Surprisingly Unknown” Survival Tips That Might Come In Handy One Day

5. If you are ever involved in gunfire or a shooting of any sort, a sharp cracking sound means the gunfire is aimed at you, a deep thumping noise means the gunfire is aimed away from you —kryz0


What say you Morons?

***


OK, just a little news. The Manitowoc Minute style............


***


Is this a case of Karma? If it is couldn't happen to a bigger POS.

Anti-Trump actor Robert De Niro, a far-left, pro-lockdown zealot who’s been adamant that society must not “return to normal” amid the coronavirus pandemic, is now whining that the ongoing coronavirus lockdowns have hurt his finances.

Appearing virtually in court this week as per his ongoing divorce proceedings with his estranged wife, Grace Hightower, De Niro tried to defend his decision to cut his wife’s monthly AmEx allowance to $50,000 from $100,000 by citing the same lockdown measures he’d seemingly been more than happy to see be imposed on regular Americans.

“[L]awyers for De Niro said he cut Hightower’s credit card limit because he’s taken a huge financial hit as the restaurant chain Nobu and Greenwich Hotel, both of which he has stakes in, have been closed or partially closed for months with barely any business,” Page Six reported.


LOLGF


***


Hoarding privilege using the color red. The red zone is for loading and unloading only.

The San Diego Surfriders Foundation is calling out the person, or people, responsible for illegally painting a curb red in La Jolla Shores to stop beachgoers from parking outside their homes. It's considered a misdemeanor offense, but it does not stop people from doing it year after year in coastal communities.

“Parking is an issue, and the red curb is particularly annoying because, in most cases, it doesn’t appear to be necessary for emergency vehicles,” said Jim C.

He told NBC 7 he has lived near La Jolla Shores for 30 years and has seen red curbs pop up near the beach quite often.

***


The ONT Musical Interlude


And a bit of eye candy for an 'ette. It's one of those country songs with lyrics so clever you have to like it. With steel drums, no less. Do with them what you will.I can't abide much time on the blog these days. Your threads give the most respite. Thanks so much. - Creeper

&&&

From Moron Hrothgar............


***


I would hate to see what happens when the toothpaste cap isn't properly placed. Genius Award Winner.

A domestic dispute over toilet paper turned violent and resulted in the bust of a Florida woman for allegedly battering her boyfriend, police report.

According to an arrest report, Celesierra Thomas, 25, “left scratch marks” on the victim’s shoulder “when they were arguing over toilet paper in their residence” late Monday evening. The report does not offer further details of the toilet paper discord.

Thomas, seen at right, and the victim share a St. Petersburg home and are parents of a baby boy.


***


Tonight's ONT has been brought to you by Bridge Burning.

1584638115_ax1yzckryt.jpg


Notice: Posted with permission by the Ace Media Empire and AceCorp, LLC. No Hobos were injured in the production of this ONT. Tonight's Mystery Click - H/T Isophorone Blog

digg this
posted by Misanthropic Humanitarian at 10:01 PM

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