Saturday Overnight Open Thread (12/21/19)

Father Christmas was not in a very good frame of mind – in fact he was very depressed, That morning after breakfast, Mrs. Claus had told him that her mother was coming over to stay ‘for a few days’. He knew that would be for several weeks, and as Christmas was approaching, her visit was the last thing that he wanted.

And that is why, by tradition, we have a Fairy sitting on top of our Christmas Trees!

Midwestern Wisconsin Humor.

There is good and bad news from the UK. First, the good news. Liberal whackos got trounced at the polls. The bad news, There is a bacon shortage.

They are cherished staples of a traditional Christmas dinner plate, but some Wetherspoon’s customers looking to enjoy pigs in blankets during the festive season were left disappointed after being served chipolatas without a bacon casing. The pub chain, whose boss Tim Martin has repeatedly spoken in support of Brexit, said the issue was down to a temporary labour shortage at an unnamed business further up the supply chain, rather than problems with meat travelling into the UK from Europe.

He escaped death at Pearl Harbor. In death he is returned.

Divers Use WW2 Equipment To Return A Crew Member To USS Arizona

Divers from the Army conducted a unique and poignant internment when they lowered an urn containing the ashes of Lauren Bruner into the wreck of the USS Arizona.

The took place on the 78th Anniversary of the attack on Pearl Harbour. Mr. Bruner died aged 98 on the 10th of September 2019.

Just 3 shopping days until Christmas. Thinking underwear? Here's the guide for you.

For some reason, every year your mom, dad, aunt, grandma, whoever insists on getting you that six-pack of cheap white underwear that you end up using when the washer’s broken. You’re an adult ... don’t they trust you to know how to take care of your own undercarriage? Maybe it’s just a thing family members feel like they have to do. After all, they’ll never let you forget how they used to change your diapers.

Just when you thought you could no longer take the barrage of bad undies, PopSci comes in with the list of higher-grade intimates that you’d actually want to get intimate with. Whether you’re working out five days a week, trying to save the earth, or just feel like being in your skivvies, our guide to briefs, bikinis, and boxers will have you putting underwear on your wishlist for years to come.

Your ONT Cob's hobby

I guess I am boring. I enjoy plain potato chips.

Because *breathes in deeply, starts coughing* what a time to be alive, Adult Swim and Pringles have announced they're dropping a 30-second animated commercial during the Super Bowl for Pickle Rick flavored chips, which will be available nationwide the same day. Some more info while I buy all the Cool Ranch Doritos in the break room vending machine, then sell them to coworkers for $2 instead of $1. Never stop hustlin':

The ONT Is Always Looking Out For You^TM Hangover helpers.

Had a late night at the company holiday party? Feel a tickle in your throat and worried it’s the flu? Or are you suffering from the classic celebrity affliction of “exhaustion”? Hook up your vein to a banana bag, baby, and you’ll feel better in no time!

Concierge IV treatments are among the most extravagant wellness trends of the past few years. For anywhere from $100 to $400, a nurse will come to your home, office, or hotel room to deliver a saline solution full of electrolytes, vitamin supplements, and, occasionally, prescription medications — like an anti-nausea drug — straight into your veins.

Skip steps 1-5. Just jump to Step 6 when your car/truck/scooter is stranded in the snow.

Too high for the class roomGenius Award Winner.

A substitute teacher at North Attleborough High School was fired on Monday for smoking in a classroom, according to school officials.

Principal Peter Haviland told NBC 10 News that students quickly reported the substitute teacher for "smoking marijuana."

Haviland said the substitute teacher was removed from the school and is not allowed back on campus.

Tonight's ONT has been brought to you by Christmas Stockings.

Notice: Posted with permission by the Ace Media Empire and AceCorp, LLC. Saturday Night is alright for ONTing.

posted by Misanthropic Humanitarian at 10:00 PM

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