Sponsored Content




Intermarkets' Privacy Policy
Support


Donate to Ace of Spades HQ!



Recent Entries
Absent Friends
Bandersnatch 2024
GnuBreed 2024
Captain Hate 2023
moon_over_vermont 2023
westminsterdogshow 2023
Ann Wilson(Empire1) 2022
Dave In Texas 2022
Jesse in D.C. 2022
OregonMuse 2022
redc1c4 2021
Tami 2021
Chavez the Hugo 2020
Ibguy 2020
Rickl 2019
Joffen 2014
AoSHQ Writers Group
A site for members of the Horde to post their stories seeking beta readers, editing help, brainstorming, and story ideas. Also to share links to potential publishing outlets, writing help sites, and videos posting tips to get published. Contact OrangeEnt for info:
maildrop62 at proton dot me
Cutting The Cord And Email Security
Moron Meet-Ups

NoVaMoMe 2024: 06/08/2024
Arlington, VA
Details to follow


Texas MoMe 2024: 10/18/2024-10/19/2024 Corsicana,TX
Contact Ben Had for info





















« AoSHQ KickStart Campaign To Buy David Hogg A Chin | Main | EMT 04/08/18 »
April 07, 2018

Saturday Overnight Open Thread (4/7/18 )

late-night-randomness-20180322-114.jpg

(The ONT is a carnival)


THE PROPER WAY TO CALL A GUY A BASTARD

A guy was getting ready to tee off on the first hole at the local
golf course when a second golfer approached and asked if he could join him.

The first said that he usually played alone, but agreed to the twosome.

They were even after the first two holes. The second guy said, "We're
about evenly matched, how about playing for five bucks a hole?"

The first guy said that he wasn't much for betting, but agreed to the terms.

The second guy won the remaining sixteen holes with ease. As they were
walking off number eighteen, the second guy was busy counting his $80.00.
He confessed that he was the pro at a neighboring course and
liked to pick on suckers.

The first fellow revealed that he was the Parish Priest.

The pro was flustered and apologetic, offering to return the money.

The Priest said, "You won fair and square and I was foolish to bet with you.
You keep your winnings."

The pro said, "Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?"

The Priest said, "Well, you could come to Mass on Sunday and make a donation.
And, if you want to bring your mother and father along, I'll marry them"


*****


Perhaps you haven't been following the Kevin D. Williamson brouhaha to closely. What really happened to KDW.

Kevin Williamson was — since his career is now toast, thankfully — a surrender monkey to the Left, so long as he could keep his pet issues alive. Like most conservatives, he was a libertarian, which means he accepts Leftist control of society but wants his own personal economic freedom; like them, he is an individualist, or someone who believes that the individual is more important than social order or natural order. He also accepted the McChristian notion that as long as we fight abortion and blasphemy, and keep our ¡principles! in tact, we have somehow won even though our future is a Benedict Option of retreat as our civilization collapses.

*****

Living on the edge. Flipping off fate and losing. Speedballs.

The Deadly Drug Cocktail That’s Claimed Too Many Lives

Speedballs have claimed the lives of several of your favorite celebrities, but its popularity doesn't seem to be declining.


*****


The ONT's favorite play by play announcer Bob Menery vs. Golden Tate in a golf match. It's The ONT, of course it's NSFW-Language

*****


mudandesewer.jpg

What is the best everyday invention evah? Sliced bread? Sliced cheese? Wrong. It would be the sewer.


*****


The ONT Musical Interlude


***



*****


Google is claiming it is "journalistic". The “RIGHT TO BE FORGOTTEN”

IN THE FIRST “RIGHT TO BE FORGOTTEN” case to reach England’s High Court, two men are fighting to keep their past crimes out of Google’s search results, and the tech giant is fighting back by claiming it’s “journalistic.”

The case, which is actually two nearly identical cases, involves two businessmen who were both convicted of white-collar crimes in the ’90s, and requested that Google delist several URLs referencing their convictions, including news articles. When Google denied their requests, they sued under a 2014 European Union ruling which established the right of individuals to have information delisted from search indexes under certain conditions.

*****


How to become a vegetarian.


*****


You know you're from California if......

1. Your coworker has 8 body piercings and none are visible.
2. You make over $300,000 and still can’t afford a house.
3. You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a conversation in English.
4. Your child’s 3rd-grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is named Flower.
5. You can’t remember . . . is pot illegal?
6. You’ve been to a baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm donor.


*****


Have you had a bad day? How do you rate with these folks?


*****


Out on bond, why not interact with the police? Genius Award Winner.

GLENDALE — A man out on bail, released from custody in October, is accused of slamming his vehicle into a Glendale police squad head-on while fleeing police after investigators say he stole lighters from a Speedway gas station — a crime he admitted to.

Dushawn Vaden, 24, of Milwaukee faces the following charges:

Misdemeanor retail theft (intentionally taking less than $500)
Obstructing an officer
Hit-and-run of an attended vehicle
Operating a motor vehicle while revoked
Possession of a controlled substance
Felony bail jumping


*****


Tonight's ONT has been brought to you by One and Done Sammich Artists.

ldt11.jpg


Notice: Posted with permission by AceCorp, LLC. Resume services provided for former Atlantic writers.

digg this
posted by Misanthropic Humanitarian at 10:05 PM

| Access Comments




Recent Comments
weft cut-loop[/i][/b] [/s]: "[]i[Some statins cause both short term and long te ..."

torabora : "Pro-choice Democrat marylin lands gives anti-abort ..."

Ciampino - Was I going upstair when called?s or downstairs: "426 Posted by: Braenyard at March 28, 2024 01:09 ..."

Braenyard: "I'm overtime, y'all have a good evening. ..."

RickZ: "[i]Didn't think Kennedy would pick someone that nu ..."

mikeski: "[i]Pete Buttgiggity to sport a smug look on his fa ..."

mikeski: "[i]The original Siamese Twins, the Bunker twins, w ..."

Ciampino - Tabasco to the fartclam: "515 And some national fake day, a Tranny Day of W ..."

Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come: "[i]509 Ramadan lights will be on display in centra ..."

raimondo: " Pro-choice Democrat marylin lands gives anti-abor ..."

Braenyard: "Didn't think Kennedy would pick someone that nuts. ..."

Ciampino - Another communist?: "Robert F. Kennedy Jr. VP pick Nicole Shanahan help ..."

Recent Entries
Search


Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64