The Morning Rant

"So Ernie my feeder comes in yesterday with the usual daily shovelful of sh* I got to eat and I ask him, Ernie, what do you do if you've got an elephant with three balls? And he says, I don't know, GP, what *do* you do if you've got an elephant with three balls?. And I says, you walk him and pitch to the rhino. Ha ha, get it? Pretty funny, huh? And then I see Ernie moving his lips like he's repeating the joke to himself, and then, bam, nothing, he just stares at me with this dumb look on his face. I'm telling you, I could be writing for Conan O'Brien if I weren't surrounded by idiots."

I sleep soundly at night knowing that the New York Times hires only the best and brightest people:

WH aide w unclear role says the military's job is to kill people https://t.co/CD11nUkJUr

— Maggie Haberman (@maggieNYT) July 29, 2017

What's disheartening is that a lot of the comments are even dumberer.

Yes, an elected federal official actually said this:

Last night proved, once again, that there is no anxiety or sadness or fear you feel right now that cannot be cured by political action.

— Chris Murphy (@ChrisMurphyCT) July 28, 2017

pic.twitter.com/NNvhhJagwG

— Still with Trump (@TrumpSupport13) July 29, 2017

I can't duplicate Monty's great 'DOOM' threads, so this will have to do:

Postmodernism is not merely some bizarre fascination of the lunatic Left... pic.twitter.com/y9dfLpEebW

— Michael Rectenwald (@antipcnyuprof) July 18, 2017

posted by OregonMuse at 11:29 AM

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